Pero Let Me Tell You

Sorry caballero, had a bit of a last minute situation so we couldn’t record this week but take a listen to when we had the pleasure of visiting the Que Bola podcast with our buddy Darwin Figueroa…be back next week with an all new episode!End Song: Anticipating by Britney Spears Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ep 57. Pero…it’s a Hamburger House Party with Burger BeastLet the comelata continue…we may have to stage a flan intervention…#flanface…oh, Uncle Joe…mira, Hiealah deja la comemierderia del stress…more Asians need to take a stand and more of us should support them…always come back for seconds of Burger (Beast)…maybe DJ will put his recipe up, if you ask nice enough…hi Fat Girl Hedonist!…drag queens and NightOwl Cookies, the perfect combo…and add some Creamy Creations flan too…so many 10% fee plugs…hell YEAH we’re hosting Croquetapalooza…DJ totally created the box set concept…lots of love & croquetas to Britney Spears…End Song: Change Your Mind (No Seas Cortes) by Britney SpearsAll About The Burger: https://burgerbeast.com/2019/02/26/all-about-the-burger-book/The Burger Museum: http://burgerbeast.com/burger-museum/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Public debate Jimmy Fallon or Lonely Island or neither…charges dropped vs cleared of charges…feet are gross, no debate needed…si no te puedes limpiar el fondillo, you shouldn’t be on social media…#FakeFriday…in a pinch, a glue gun might get the job done…ay, people just aren’t happy regardless…maybe we’ll start playing Fortnite too…she’s telling all of our stories…6%?! That’s insane in 2019…Rita Moreno is a national treasure and then some…seriously, how many times can a sitcom make a person cry…a sitcom with 2 almost middle-aged podcast hosts would be a massive hit…never be afraid to represent…seriously though, don’t steal our reboot ideas, this acts as a copyright lite…come back, Crystal Bernard…End Song: Theme from “Wings” Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Let’s find the Latina Suze Orman to swing by our show…here goes another frivolous lawsuit…maybe sometimes we should tell kids they CAN’T do everything they dream…at what point do you have to step back and concede…whenever you feel unmotivated, just think of Chef Hales…live abroad, hell, at least away from where you were born…tap into your experiences to create your future…seriously, Purdy Lounge should be on tourist excursions…fine dining doesn’t need to be expensive to be delicious…camp-tacular doesn’t even begin to describe…End Song: “Acapulco H.E.A.T.” themeSakaya Kitchen: http://www.sakayakitchen.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well, now we know where that Full House money went…ugh, we couldn’t get accepted to higher education now, guess it’s 5 more years of podcasting, then…Take up your pens for fantasia, my fellow Latinx writers…mira que we love the supernatural…magical realism isn’t the worst thing to be known for…ugh, nobody wants a disembodied racist head…see “This Changes Everything,” fantastic documentary, thanks Miami Film Festival…don’t lift up stuff that sucks…virulently (for the record)…unlike culottes, racism has never gone away…never change Calle Ocho…End Song: “Goin’ Down” by Melanie CDaniel Jose Older: http://danieljoseolder.net/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It’s a Miami thing…what defines YOUR hometown…guava on everything…que rico, los aguacates…RIP Luke Perry & Katherine Helmond…is there a difference between narcissism and autosexuality…but, of course, you should love yourself…still not over that guy being Australian…if only LaToya and Lindsay collaborated on, well, anything…maybe documentaries aren’t supposed to be journalistic…congrats to whoever won the CBS Sunday Morning pool…sometimes we really do have to stop and realize how lucky we are…don’t forget to swing by Hialeah for 305 Day…End Song: “Feels Like Love” by LaToya JacksonLittle Wings Wine: https://www.littlewingswine.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we welcome Gabriel Lopez, The Punisher 305 from XQume Miami and Miami Geeks podcast, as our guest co-host…sometimes a logo’s just a logo, even when it’s upside down and mistaken for the name of God…said it before, say it again, never change Hialeah…with all his voices, it’s like having multiple co-hosts…oh Jussie, who even has checks in 2019…let’s see if charges stick to R Kelly this time…you know how much we love our song title conversations…ugh, now I have to rethink my love Michael Jackson music too...documentaries are an odd sort of objective, but with an angle…if you’re in Miami on March 9, head out to 305 Day and keep an eye out for all 3 of us!End Song: “Still Not a Player” Big Pun Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Yeah, we sorta had to record in a hurry of sorts, so yeah, echo…ugh, it’s never good to give racistas ammunition…how small can a bleach bottle be…it WAS filmed in Japan…is there like a fashion council to petition or something…What can you really confess to in a taxi?…just 3 Miami boys chatting it up…all saying to the contrary, arroz con mango is pretty yummy…sometimes you just have to take that leap…delightfully inappropriate…we all love ourselves a bit of HGTV…if you’re going to be petty, at least have a purpose…look at us having a 6 degrees of separation moment…listen if that guy didn’t let his limits stop him from his dream…End Song: “What Dreams are Made of” by Hilary DuffOrlando Leyba: http://heylando.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We really are going to be everywhere this weekend…if only we actually liked gold…you CAN do a $5 foot long dammit….sad week when blackface is the lead story so damn often…ay Gucci, that turtleneck isn’t just offensive it’s hideous…anyone wanna take a stab at what the Lohan brand is about…train wreck begets train wreck, we suppose…implied sex is just as hot sometimes…Diana Ross should tour with Celine Dion…mmmm, freestyle & sandwiches…CLONE CLUB FOREVER…an elemental medley is the best kinda medley…End Song: “Goldeneye” by Tina Turner Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Overall a less than super, Bowl game…stupid M.A.S.H. ratings…sometimes, you pick the topic and sometimes the topic picks you…maybe it’s time to remake Silence of the Lambs WITH Julie Andrews as Hannibal Lecter…tenacity, it’s what we do…no, really Ish is still deathly afraid of pressure cookers…reclaim YOUR time, listeners…now taking suggestions on how to make our food “clean”…RIP el camello…said it once, say it again, latinos come in all colors…politics and DC go together like arroz con pollo…Venezuela and all of Latin America needs more coverage AND representation, dammit…go Ana Navarro…always look for ways to give back…if you’re in Los Angeles, try Equelecua, you won’t regret it…End Song: “Wake Up Call (Mark Ronson mix)” by Maroon 5Adventure Amputee Camp: https://adventureamputeecamp.org/Equelecua Vegan Café: https://equelecuacafe.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Empire IS better, but c’mon Ewoks are sooooo cute…Remember when the wildest thing related to airlines we brought up was peacocks…dear fellow Spanish speakers, let’s agree that grajo really has no translation…VENEZUELA ESTAMOS CONTIGO…ojala que change is on its way for our Venezuelan brothers and sisters…we still can’t believe we spoke with such an iconic part of our childhood…representation matters, even when you’re made of felt…a children’s educational program is still possibly the most consistently progressive thing on TV…44 years HAS to be a record, it just has to be…GodSpell, Sesame Street, Loud House AND SVU?!?...now we’re just one degree from Lin-Maunel Miranda AND Rita Moreno…DJ gave THAT GUY a last soda?!?!...pretty sure everyone guessed how we were gonna end this episode…End Song: “Sesame Street” theme Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ep 47. Pero…it’s 2019 and we’re back with Season 2!So much to catch up on, even if we saw each other last week…quick poll, who prefers DJ with short hair…seriously, Gaga your enigma isn’t that mysterious…what happens in Vegas gets posted on our IG…be angry but don’t pretend to be surprised by R Kelly’s antics…don’t pretend you didn’t love seeing all those entitled brats get suckered on a Caribbean island…Madge even influences our use of curse words, apparently…sometimes finding the last soda isn’t as easy as you’d think…don’t forget to be one of the first three to send us the secret word via DM…End Song: “Do What You Want” by Lady Gaga ft R Kelly Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you all for your love this year and tuning in to hear the rants of two lifelong friends. Hope you have a great holiday full of family, love and all the best! Happy 2019 a todos!P.S. – we’ll only be gone for 2 weeks….promise :-)Intro Song: “Feliz Navidad” by CharoEnd Song: “Burrito Sabanero (remix)” by DJ Laz Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Yo, CBS Sunday Morning, sponsor us already…send us emails people…anybody with Expose connections, hook some brothers up…frankly, the Academy should just ask us to host the Oscars…who better for year-end guests…there’s a Hialeah in every country…latinos, not known for subtlety…shout out Vicky Bakery…we tried, but words don’t really capture Hialeah…check out Love & Hostages….for the last time, South Beach is NOT Miami…PALO is one of the best live acts in South Florida…Sabado Gigante, gone but not forgotten…even Olympians are on the show…no matter how old, you never lose the ‘ito’…authenticity always shines through…we do genuinely love ALL our guests…RIP Rosa Maria PlasenciaEnd Song: “Into the Night” Benny MardonesHialeah the Series: https://www.facebook.com/HialeahSeries/Adopted by Aliens: https://igg.me/at/AdoptedByAliens/x/19004233Love & Hostages: Available to stream on Amazon Prime, iTunes, Google Play and Roku TVThe Fallen Patriots Fund: http://www.fallenpatriotfund.org/Amigos for Kids: https://amig

Thanks for the Christmas tree shortage, Amazon…at least our 100th should have cidra…RIP President Bush…bad decisions don’t make a bad person…context is everything…she’s literally leaning in for the damn kiss…during these holidays, make sure to eat ALL the bacon and lechon…We agree, no boots in Dallas or Miami until it’s at least below 75 degrees…still wearing our geek on our sleeve…can’t out train your diet, especially during the holidays…so often things are in the works without us knowing it…social media, where benefit meets tragedy daily…Kevin, you’re an honorary Latino as far as we’re concerned…food really is the great connector… we’re now officially one degree from Oprah…choices, people, choices…End Song: “Physical” by Olivia Newton-John & Jane LynchFit Men Cook: https://fitmencook.comHabitat for Humanity: https://www.habitat.orgBRC: http://www.brc.org Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Give JLove some love…llegaron las navidad…coquito is way better than egg nog…should we buy a vaquita…nothing says Merry Christmas like Gilead trees…kiss who you want, within reason, of course…double Beckham pop kiss…Chicago and Hialeah, more similar than you’d imagine…know where you’re from, know where you’re going…ideas are great, but the details make it come to life…an island full of contradictions…is there anything “Friends” can’t do…both and neither simultaneously…damn age restrictions…ugh, poverty porn…yummy, a McFrita’s…#lechonlifeCubaOne Foundation: www.cubaone.orgEveryday Ambassador: www.everydayambassador.orgGuardian Ad Litem: http://guardianadlitem.org/The Hero Initiative: https://www.heroinitiative.org/End Song: “Let Your Head Go” by Victoria Beckham Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Japi Sangibing…so long as the food is yummy, nothing else matters…Indians & Pilgrims celebrated a massacre with pie & whipped cream…secret origins can be disappointing at times…Always with the real Havana Club…the Pero Happy Hour…double trouble when chatting with twins…cigars and café con leche are on most Cuban baby registries…damn right grown and sexy…evolving even after death…pretty sure most of our listeners argue with us each week…never be afraid to be the first…Latinos come in all shades…despite loving Celia Cruz, don’t “Celia Cruz” anyone…ya esta Bueno ya…blackface in 2018 caballero…more than anything we’re thankful for all of you!End Song: “The Jeffersons” themeTres Lindas Cubanas: http://www.treslindascubanascigars.com/Afro Latinos Professionals Group: https://www.facebook.com/AfroLatinoProfessionals/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This ep is a bit long, but worth it…Xuxa and Lady Marmalade, perfect combo…Glitter, the product and the album, show up when you least expect them…when we’re upset over new versions of Monopoly, the terrorists have won…thanks for white nonsense, Mommas and Merlot…check out our Gamer Comic Expo coverage on YouTube…Cocaine cowboys, you know those were fast horses…when lies come true, are they still lies…no lie, growing up Ish thought marimberos were a type of musician…trickle down works when narcotics are flowing…in Florida, true crime was hot before it was hot…nobody cares until you step on their corn…Miami Vice was basically a fictionalized documentary…yeah, Hispanics were even part of Watergate…”because Miami” may just be our new tagline…can’t wait to see “Screwball”…End Song: “Amazing Spider-Man theme”GeekBro: http://www.geekbro.net/Billy Corben: http://www.rakontur.com/cocaine-cowboys Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Shootings shouldn’t be the new normal…even sans Posh, Girl Power makes everything better…if only Prince had run for office…always choose half full, total people are still gonna be comemierdas..Start book clubs mi gente…60 people is an intimate family by Hispanic standards…where would you leave a loved ones ashes…sign of a good writer? Being able to write about somewhere without being there…it’s never easy to write about yourself…seriously, watch One Day at a Time…never give up a chance to quote Legally Blonde…this is quite the quote heavy episode…ya sabes, be professional…ebook vs physical book…we always miss our loved ones…End Song: “40 y 20” by Jose JoseGeekBro: http://www.geekbro.net/Chanel Cleeton: http://www.chanelcleeton.com/Gamer Comic Expo: https://www.gamercomicexpo.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

4 voices at once…Stephanie’s jingle jangle bracelet is almost a lullaby…sometimes you choose podcasting, sometimes podcasting chooses you…Spice Up ALL our lives…ha, they think we’re structured…sometimes you get pastelitos, sometimes you get meats & cheeses…burlap is the modern event planner’s soul killer…btw kids, you can now find us on the Geek Bro network…if you don’t love Maleficent, you can’t sit with us…stop the white nonsense, brag boards aren’t a bad thing…Broadway bonding…even in Miami, winter is coming…Beyonce, really not even Solange…this week’s last soda totally devolved thanks to wine…End Song: Once Upon a Dream (From “Maleficent”/Young Ruffian Remix) by Lana del ReyGeek Bro: http://www.geekbro.net/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.