Emergency Pants Podcast

Episode 73: LIVE! from the Relax the Balls store in Palatine, Illinois, (next to the Petco) IT’S EMERGENCY PANTS!!! God smited us. Smited? Smote? Smote. Anyway, he totally smote us! TWICE! Lindsay is back! DAMN YOU, LINDSAY!!!! Rose made us aware of Personal Furnishings and THEN made us aware of this video! We love you, … Continue reading »

**** Hey everyone – tonight’s episode was horribly mangled. We’re having a hard time dealing with it, because it was pretty awesome. We left the links as is for your enjoyment. **** Episode 72: We really are sorry. Penny sent us this fake sitcom link! Bex sent us Shut Up, Woman, Get On My Horse. … Continue reading »

Episode 71: Balls. Shane has an excellent idea for a weight loss commercial Bridget had a job interview! I know, right? Shane has ideas about alternative ways to use the shakeweight, Bridget nearly dies laughing We love Fake AP Stylebook, and we bet you will, too! We love Mythbusters, and Bridget loves Adam Savage Bridget … Continue reading »

Episode 70: You know. That one. With the thingie. And stuff. You KNOW. Shane has trombone legs after a strenuous workout at the gym. DAMN YOU, LINDSEY! *shakes fist at sky* Send us stuff with You Send It! Or don’t. It’s cool. We don’t want to pressure you, baby. Yay for DJ Yoda! Especially this! … Continue reading »

Episode 69: Tonight’s episode was recorded at Schropshire Lodge, Near Wallingham, Blethington, West Hamptishiretinfinlinton, just past the three bagpipers, Scotland. Doctor’s waiting rooms often lead to hilarity Shane got a shake weight! I wouldn’t say no to a crepe, but what I REALLY need is a spanking. The Consumerist is required reading Jim is shirtless … Continue reading »

Episode 68: We’re on collision course with WACKINESS! Please excuse Bridget’s icky voice, she has the the Dreaded Lurgy. Rose sent us this awesome link which provided our cover art. The hubcaps are my favorite! Shane is using a fancy new safety razor! This book talks about how things aren’t made like they used to … Continue reading »

Episode 67: You like that, huh? Bridget is fulfilling her responsibility as an American citizen by participating in the judicial process. And junk. We love God Hates Protesters Bridget loves Christopher Uminga. Shane is frightened. Have you ever had a shameful nerd argument? Tell us about it! Never put spoons in your lungs. What are … Continue reading »

Episode 66: We learned it from YOU, listeners! We learned it by watching YOU! Bridget calls shenanigans on this Miracle Whip commercial There was a snuggie fashion show. For reals! We can’t believe that somebody actually took the time to make Mega Shark VS Giant Octopus Psych is one of the funniest damn shows on … Continue reading »

Episode 65: We’re a loner, Dotty. A rebel. Thanks to Chedderfish for alerting us to the picture we discuss in today’s episode. It is also today’s cover art. Soak it in, people. Use the Proper Words! Bridget went to the Renegade Craft Fair! Emily and Adam of Moesewco escorted her and told her about making … Continue reading »

Episode 64 – We talked about stuff, figured out that Shane wasn’t recording, and then we talked about stuff again. PUPPY! Hey, British? What’s your deal? What the hell is a stone? And what does going pear shaped mean? Bridget begs Laura for forgiveness for not mentioning that she sent the porn candy wrapper link … Continue reading »

Episode 63 – They’re telling secrets, honey. Keri sent us this awesome link to the techno version of the Slap Chop commercial! Watch it! You’re gonna love his nuts! Shae is awesome and has her own Youtube page! She talked about us in this video! CHECK IT OUT! WE KNOW HER! Thicknecked drunken douchebags are … Continue reading »

Cats. Bridget gets birthday goodies! Nice words and videos! A ninguin from Shane! A ghost from Jamie! Lia’s Dad is awesome Bridget is a horrible, selfish person who cannot handle knowing that there is a present for her somewhere but not knowing what it is Black market mustaches cats This is a short one guys, … Continue reading »

Episode 61: DEAL WITH IT, PINKBOY! And Happy Birthday, Johnny Murder! Ben makes more stuff that is cool Shane walks into a nerdstorm Hey, Joe! Whaddya know? David Blaine and Criss Angel – meh. Gute von schlechten We love to eavesdrop It’s not just a fetish of Bridget’s – crying guys are HILARIOUS! Watch Wrestling Crying … Continue reading »

It’s episode 60, where we start off by talking about cool stuff and then suddenly become that one old guy always telling the neighborhood kids to get off his lawn. Shane has a bad ass tattoo! Also, his skin is falling off! Gross! Poltergeist and Aliens are pantscrappingly scary Movie theater shenanigans – fight or … Continue reading »

Episode 59 – PANTS PARTY! Everybody’s in this one! Shane, Bridget, Tony and Jamie hang out in their fuzzy feetie pajamas and talk about boys. A very specific part of boys. Jamie made today’s cover art! Thanks Jamie! Unrelated: visit Photoshop Disasters Holy crap there is a Snuggie for dogs Moo and oink – just … Continue reading »

More anniversary/birthday goodness, headed your way. Can you believe we made it a whole YEAR? Tony, Shane, and Bridget read your emails, listen to your messages, and play some of your favorite bits from the podcast. Join us on this trip down memory lane, won’t you? Thank you! Thanks to all of our listeners, you … Continue reading »

It’s here! It’s here! The really big shew! So big, we’re breaking it down into manageable, bite-sized pieces. Can you believe we made it a whole YEAR? Tony, Shane, and Bridget read your emails, listen to your messages, and play some of your favorite bits from the podcast. Join us on this trip down memory … Continue reading »

Episode 56: We got nothin’! Sometimes we get cranky Summer vacations: lame or awesome? Johnny Murder went under the knife! Go here to send him and Penny some love Bridget struggles to finish a monumental task, meanwhile Shane never finishes anyth We love you guys. All of you. Especially you! *muah* Next week we’re hoping … Continue reading »

Episode 55: Afternoon Delight! Shane makes Washington, D. C. a very lucky lady Warner Brothers cartoons. We miss them! Shane wants to abduct himself Look at these fucking hipsters. Penny Skatt rolls Bridget. Those guys need to put their shirts back on! And stop showing me your O face! Gross! Bridget is at peace with … Continue reading »

Episode 54: Stuff happened. I don’t remember all of it. I’m bad at things. Thanks to Tara for sending us swanky postcards that double as cover art! We consider doing a crinkle-cast Bridget tries to do a bit, Shane lets it die on the vine. We tell you what our theme songs are and what … Continue reading »