Mind Poison Podcast

Well, all good things must come to an end. And things like Mind Poison do too. I mean really, the saying just should be “things must come to an end.” But it’s time for Mark and Jesse to hang up the headphones - we present to you, the Final Episode of Mind Poison. The Boys of Summer throw on the headphones one last time to reminisce about the Times that Were. Good times, good times. A lot of shows would have something special planned, or have some greatest hits. But instead, we’ve got… technical difficulties. Fitting, really. Try not to tear up as we look forlornly at the empty studio and turn down the lights for the last time.

Don’t you think you’ve had enough of those dang Olympics by now? Why don’t you take a freaking break from International Handball or whatever and try some Mind Poison on for size? I mean, Savannah Guthrie and Mike Tirico aren’t going to fill you in on all the hot topics like Mark and Jesse will… topics such as the Monastic Lifestyle. Like the SI Swimsuit Issue (hey, SISI - you think that’s on purpose?). Topics like Using Your Phone Too Much. If we could do it all again we’d probably talk about the Olympics, but you know how it goes. (PS - If you missed the joke - Savannah and Mike are hosts of the Olympics this year… in case your brain’s been rotted from too much Water Polo!)

[vogue, strike a pose, etc.]… Look, I’ve been there - I know it’s hard to pay total attention with the flashbulbs constantly going off in your face. But keep one eye on the runway and one eye over your shoulder, because a couple of newly-minted fashionistas are hot on your tail. That’s right - Mark and Jesse are getting into the fashion game. (Seriously, there’s a disturbing amount of T-shirt talk in this one.) Also in this episode: the Mavens of Mind Poison talk pre-space Richard Branson and the MLB Home Run Derby.

From IMDB: An employee is determined to have a day off from work, despite what his boss thinks of that. Sounds like a good one! On this episode of Mind Poison, Mark and Jesse talk about Big Changes at Subway, some Hot New Reboot Ideas, and the 4th of July (a week or so too late).  Plus, they throw their hat in the ring for the Host opening at “The View.” Hope you’re listening, Lincoln Square Productions!

Well, here it is. A day late and a dollar short. Actually… a day late, and *so* many dollars short. It’s getting pretty grim over here, if I’m being honest. But anyways, a belated Mind Poison is better than no Mind Poison, right? In this episode, Mark and Jesse get into Local Carnivals, Billionaires in Space, and the Sad State of the World. Plus… the worst conspiracy theory ever.

Golf Fandom. Neighborhood Rivalries. The History of the A-shirt. What do these things have in common? (Besides the fact that you may not care about any of them...) They are all parts of the Mind Poison 142nd episode “spectacular!” Right here - exclusively on the internet. Check it out, and don’t forget to have some fun, eh?

We’re back after a longer than expected break! Hopefully we were ever present in your hearts. Because that’s one place we never - EVER - want to leave. And honestly will probably put up a fight if you ever try. Should we have done this when we were together in person? Sure, you bet, but let’s let bygones be bygones. Plus, that “Ghost Loop” on Demand isn’t going to watch itself, you know? So, it’s another episode of this dang thing, as Mark and Jesse find themselves in slightly dour moods. You’ve got some electric bike talk, some talk about Joes, and a fair amount of self-loathing. Enjoy!

This is a podcast within a grab bag. Do you like that kind of thing? If so, you may be ready. Are you ready for a Mind Poison Podcast grab bag challenge? If so, and again, you may be ready... and there is little else for you to do now... and not much of a challenge to undertake at all, I suppose. Just enjoy!

...And we’re back! Coming in hot and heavy with another hour - almost your recommended daily allowance - of Mind Poison. Use only as directed. For this episode, Mark and Jesse talk about COVID Definitely Being Totally Over, Traveling Once Again, and Small Town Gossip. Plus, what’s new and hot on Peacock!

So, it has come crashing down and it hurts inside. Whatchoo gonna do, brother? Well, one thing you could do is listen to Mind Poison. You could say this episode has it all. It’d be wrong, but you could say it. But it does have talk about Aliens, Helping Strangers, Dad Movies, Multi-Headed Shark Attack Movies, and The Real American Quiz. Thanks for listening, if you’re into that sort of thing! Mind Poison: The Number One Podcast for After It Has Come Crashing Down and Hurts Inside.

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today, in sickness and in health, to forgive all our tresspasses. Tresspasses in this episode include discussing the Oscars from like forever ago, Kids and MMA, and Catching a Ball thrown from Very Far Away. Thank you for the Mind Poison you are about to receive, for richer or poorer (probably more likely to be poorer, if I’m being honest!) for ever and ever, Amen.

Let’s get this party started. Throw your hands in the air. Dance like no one is watching. Heck yeah, that should get you hyped for this episode! If that won’t do it, nothing will. This time around, The Masters of Mind Poison are all about streaming, so make sure your internet speed is up to snuff. We’re talking Life in the Cloud and Peacock… and if you’re interested in the new Saved by the Bell (but not enough to watch it) Mark breaks it down. He also wonders what happens when you die. Plus, Jesse found some money. Don’t like what we’re saying? (pointing at my pouty lips...) Well, Stream This!

Uh-oh - Mind Poison o’clock. 4:20 is taken, so I guess we’d be… 1:16 in the afternoon, how’s that sound? Can you convert numbers to times, or is that just for geniuses to figure out. Anyways, you can listen to this episode whenever you want. Or don’t - it’s a free country! (At least when I wrote this, who knows by now with the way things are going… Sheesh!) In this episode, the Boys of Mind Poison talk about their Elementary School Janitor, Pro Football Mascots, and Home Theater Setups. Mark has beef with Peacock, and Jesse issues an apology to Wally the Beer Man.

The 2020 flu vaccine was fine - a little disappointing because it’s one of my favorite seasonals. It paled in comparison to the 2018 batch (the one with formaldehyde bouquet). I’ve heard this new one is *just like the flu* so I’m giving it a shot (squirts some in the air from the vial and sniffs). Ooh, is that a little polysorbate-80 I smell in there? And notes of ethanol? Plus, I’ve been into oranges lately, so the citric acid monohydrate should be right up my alley. Bottom’s up! (Which would maybe even be a joke if you got vaxxed in the buttocks, but sounds like that’s not how it goes.)

SPRING BREAK*! Get out your sandals, blow up those arm floaties and get ready to build a sick sand castle, ‘cuz it’s time to get away from that homework for a week and cut loose. Studies have shown (Spring Break Quarterly, Vol. 34 - 2019) that listening to Mind Poison will enhance everyone’s enjoyment of Spring Break, so turn on that bluetooth speaker and let the whole dang beach get in on the fun! Mark and Jesse celebrate this special Spring Break Spectacular by briefly mentioning it one time. Also in this episode: Tales of 1-900 numbers, the conclusion of Jesse’s Quest for a Pole, and an intense Breath Holding Contest!  *if it’s even still going on, who the hell knows. Happy Easter!

This week’s episode is brought to you by Lowell’s Poles. Got a flag and nowhere to hang it? Looking for a fun (and sensual) new way to exercise? Or maybe you need to vault something? Come on down to Lowell’s - he’s got the right pole for you! On this week’s show, your hosts with the most(s) talk about Daylight Savings Time and if They Are Psychopaths. Plus, they debut some sweet new tech. Mark is excited for July 2023, and Jesse is looking for a pole.

Happy Saint Patrick’s Day… don’t forget to wear green! Otherwise you will be ostracized by friends and family, and you don’t want that. I wish Mark and Jesse were swimming in green beer and rubbing 4 leaf clovers all over their bodies this week (that’s how you celebrate it, right?), but they’ve had a rough go of it as of late and plum forgot. Many apologies to anyone in the Mind Poison Universe who was ready for an Irish extravaganza. But not all is lost, as it’s a good one this week. The boys talk getting Lusty at the Movies, Stimulus Checks, and have another fine idea for the Mind Poison line of home products. Jesse doubts the existence of geniuses, and Mark loves vacuuming.

It’s a tale as old as time - sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, and sometimes you’re sitting in a busted chair at work, trying to think of something clever to put in the dang show notes. Didn’t know this would be all autobiographical did you? If you’re in the market for an hour or so of Mind Poison, this right here will fit the bill. On this episode: Streaming Services (and getting mad at them), War Comedies, and More Inventions from the Mind Poison Kitchen. (Seriously though, the seat of this chair slopes downwards and you can’t change it - why would anyone want that?)

With all the division in the world today, wouldn’t it be great if we could all come together, united as one, look towards our shared future, and all listen to Mind Poison? We only get one shot at this, folks! On this episode, the Great Unifiers Mark and Jesse talk about Aura Colors, Being Alpha Kids, and The Dark Side of Personal Injury Law.

Rah Rah Sis Boom Bah - Go Team Go! Get to shaking those pom poms, because the Mind Poison Boys are coming down the tunnel, and the air in here is electric! In this episode, the Behemoths of Blabber (™) talk about Old News, Movie Candy, and more. Mark doesn’t like Smoky Trucks, and Jesse knows a disturbing amount about CBS all access. Gimme an M! (M) Gimmee an I! (I) Gimmee an N! (N) And so forth...