Rhett Smith Podcast



Therapist + Writer + SpeakerIn this long-form interview format Rhett explores the lives of various thought leaders to discover what helped them thrive in multiple areas of their lives, and what lessons we can learn from them. Rhett is particularly interested in the intersection of self-care and relationships, and he loves to explore how one can thrive physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. He interacts with people such as therapists, athletes, spiritual leaders, entrepreneurs and many others, covering a variety of topics from fitness, leadership, mental health, and spirituality.What would your marriage look like when you are thriving? What does your parenting look like when you are thriving? What does your work look like when you are thriving? What does your faith look like when you are thriving? When we thrive in these areas of our lives we become people who are "life-giving." And when we are "life-givers" we impact all the relationships around us in positive ways. So engage the podcast and discover how you can thrive personally and relationally.


  • Encouragement in Your Anxiety

    17/04/2020 Duración: 10min

    Part of being human is that we get anxious. And no human can opt out of experiencing anxiety. It visits all of us at varying times in our lives, and to varying degrees. But what if you can reframe anxiety in a way that you see it as a friend, rather than a foe. What if your anxiety could help you grow? I explore this and what it means to be anxious. And how we often misinterpret critical passages and understandings on this topic.

  • Importance of Play and Rest at Home and in Organizations

    15/04/2020 Duración: 08min

    Todd Sandel (CEO and Founder of The SouthCity Group) and I discuss the importance of play and rest at home and in organizations. One of the most important things leaders can do is model from top down the importance of play and rest to their teams.

  • Addressing Leadership Drift During Times of Uncertainty

    15/04/2020 Duración: 09min

    Todd Sandel (CEO and founder of The SouthCity Group) and I continue our conversation around leadership during this time of uncertainty due to COVID-19. In this episode we address leadership drift due to overworking and trying to prove ourselves worthy of adding value.

  • Productivity, Personal Wellness and Burnout

    15/04/2020 Duración: 10min

    In my ongoing conversations with Todd Sandel (CEO and founder of The SouthCity Group), we discuss the difference between personal wellness and productivity. One leads to burnout, while the other can lead to a thriving home and organization.

  • Habits, Routines and Tuning In to One Another

    15/04/2020 Duración: 09min

    Todd Sandel (CEO and founder of The SouthCity Group) and I continue our conversation about leadership during this time of uncertainty. In today's episode we focus on the habits and routines that help leaders and their organizations thrive during this time. As well as talking about what that looks like in the home. Specifically the importance of tuning in with one another.

  • "Trimming the Sails"

    15/04/2020 Duración: 10min

    In this interview I chat with CEO and founder of The SouthCity Group Todd Sandel about how leaders can navigate this time of uncertainty. We discuss the metaphor of trimming the sails and how leaders and their teams can identify and prioritize what is most important during this time. This is critical in organizations and in the home.  

  • Deeper Dive Into the Movement of Orientation, Disorientation, New Orientation

    03/04/2020 Duración: 23min

    Yesterday I posted a short video on the movement from orientation to disorientation to new orientation. I first learned it by this name and paradigm by reading Walter Brueggemann's work, The Message of the Psalms. The movement itself is as old as humanity, and it is a movement that we all go through in our lives. Currently we are in a period of global and national and local disorientation -- together -- I hope that we move into a newness when COVID-19 subsides, and that we just don't go back to our old ways. Because disorientation brings about growth. There is an opportunity for us to be a new kind of people and community.

  • COVID-19: How to Navigate Mental Health in a Time of Uncertainty

    22/03/2020 Duración: 31min

    It's been a long time since I have done a podcast. About a year actually. I was on a break for awhile, just reading, researching, writing and focusing on other kinds of work. I had nothing new to add to the conversation so thought I would hit pause. But in light of COVID-19 and how it has caused all of us to look at some things in a new way, it has also really caused a spike in people's mental health struggles...from anxiety to depression, and beyond. In this episode I wanted to keep it simple and just focus on the four pillars of self-care, which is why I started this podcast about 3 years ago. It is more critical than ever that we are being mindful of our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual capacities, as they are often the key to help up regulate our emotional reactivity...allowing us to show up in our not only our own lives...but the lives of those around us (family, friends, neighbors, community) in a way that is life-giving. And we need more than ever to be people that breathe life into th

  • Jeff and Robin Reinke on Pornography, Marriage, and Recovery

    18/04/2019 Duración: 38min

    In this episode I had the privilege of sitting down with my good friends Jeff and Robin Reinke. Besides being colleagues of mine in a workshop we lead in equipping ministry leaders in a variety of issues impacting the church, we are also co-authors in Vital Tools for Relevant Church Leaders: Restoring Relationships and Building Community During Difficult Conversations. Jeff is the Marriage and Family Pastor at North Coast Calvary Church in Carlsbad, CA, and Robin is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Carlsbad, CA. They are an amazing couple with a beautiful story of redemption and hope, and they are passionate about helping others navigate their own life struggles. In This Episode Vital Tools for Relevant Church Leaders: Restoring Relationships and Building Community During Difficult Conversations  

  • Kelly Haer Discusses the Issue of Singleness, and How Restoration Therapy Can Help One Navigate It

    11/04/2019 Duración: 01h01min

    In this episode I discuss the topic of singleness with my colleague Kelly Haer. Kelly is on staff at Pepperdine University in the Boone Center for the Family where she is the Relationship IQ Director. Kelly is a part of the teaching group that I am a part of that meets with and trains ministry leaders 3-4 times a year on issues that are impacting the church. In our time together we works towards equipping these leaders to more successfully address the issues that they come across in the local church. Singleness happens to be one of those topics that many churches are struggling to address, especially during a period of time where more and more people are not getting married, yet ministry often targets marriage and family. Kelly addresses this issue at length in our free e-book, Vital Tools for Relevant Church Leaders: Restoring Relationships and Building Community During Difficult Conversations. In this e-book, and in this conversation, she discusses the current state of singleness in the United States, its

  • Robert Scholz on Addiction Through the Lens of Restoration Therapy

    27/03/2019 Duración: 51min

    In this episode I get to sit down with a colleague of mine who I have been getting to know more over the last couple of years in our collaborative work together around Restoration Therapy and ministry leaders.   Robert Scholz is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, consultant and writer, who specializes in helping individuals and families who are struggling with addictions.   I am so glad to have Robert on the podcast, as addictions is something that I come into contact almost everyday in my work, but it's not something that I specialize in. So thankfully I have skilled people like Robert that I can refer to. In this episode we dive into what an addiction is, it's characteristics, and how it is defined. And we explore the impact of addiction on relationships, and more specifically drugs and alcohol, while also touching on the rampant and addictive nature of vaping.     Mentioned in the Episode Robert Scholz Website Vital Tools for Relevant Church Leaders: Restoring Relationships and Building Community Du

  • Conversation with Terry and Sharon Hargrave on the Beginnings and Future of Restoration Therapy and Relate Strong

    22/03/2019 Duración: 50min

    In this episode I spend some time in conversation with Terry and Sharon Hargrave. Terry is the founder of Restoration Therapy and is the Evelyn and Frank Freed Professor of Marriage and Family Therapy at Fuller Theological Seminary and Sharon is the Executive Director of the Boone Center for the Family at Pepperdine University, as well as the founder and director of Relate Strong.   I have known this couple for about 8 years, and not only do I consider them close friends, but I am a huge fan of them. Restoration Therapy has changed my life and practice, and my wife and I have also trained together in Relate Strong.   I can not say enough nice things about Terry and Sharon, and the impact they are making upon the world. In this episode we explore some of the early roots of Restoration Therapy and Relate Strong, and why we are bringing this work to ministry leaders in our workshops that we do several times a year.   Mentioned in the Episode Download your free copy of Vital Tools for Relevant Church Leaders Rest

  • Dust and Identity

    01/03/2019 Duración: 27min

      "for dust you are and to dust you will return.” (Genesis 3:19) In this episode I reflect on the passage found in Genesis 3:19 that is repeated every Ash Wednesday.   It's a beautiful, but harrowing passage that reminds us of just how fragile and short our lives are.   But this reminder, rather than being tragic, is to help us focus on our life on what is important.   We were created from the very dust of the earth (Genesis 2:7). Our first work (vocation) was to work the land (the dust) we were created from, displaying a connection between our identity and the work, service and hobbies we put our lives towards (Genesis 2:15). And yet, often, many things cut us off from this very soil (the dust), and disconnect us not only from our identity, but our Creator as well (Genesis 4:14).     Mentioned in Episode "The Summer Day" by Mary Oliver Water from Rock (Check out their Lenten Devotionals) Henri Nouwen Ray Anderson Semana Santa in Antigua, Guatemala

  • Possibly the Two Most Important Questions We Can Ask Ourselves

    28/02/2019 Duración: 35min

      And he said, "Hagar, slave-girl, of Sarai, where have you come from and where are you going?" Genesis 16:8 Where have you come from? Where are you going? Perhaps these are two of the most important and fundamental questions we can ask ourselves. I appreciate that Jay Stringer brings to these questions in his phenomenal book, Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way to Healing. It wasn't until I read his book that I realized, these are two of the most fundamental questions I have been asking my whole life...and they are the questions that I am continually asking my clients in my therapy practice. They often don't take the form of those exact sentences, but they are asked in some form or fashion throughout my work. And it is these two questions, and this text, that I dive into in this episode. I hope you enjoy the episode. And more importantly, I hope you are asking yourself these two questions. Mentioned in the Episode Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way to Healing by Jay Stringer The Mess

  • The Creation Account, Self-Differentiation and Restoration Therapy

    21/02/2019 Duración: 21min

    This episode is somewhat of a continuation of Episode 115 where I reflected both theologically and psychologically on the biblical text found in Genesis 1-3 (and a little of 4). Those opening chapters have lots of insight and implications for us relationally. In this episode I want to pick up on some of those themes, especially the idea of self-differentiation, and focus on how Restoration Therapy lends itself nicely to this concept. I think you will find this a helpful episode in understand you and your relationships better.  

  • Reframing How We Talk About Anxiety and Depression

    13/02/2019 Duración: 01h07min

    I had the opportunity this last Monday to record a video on anxiety with another therapist, and one of the pastors at Preston Trail Community Church in Frisco. And then a few hours later, I talked to a group of parents at Legacy Christian Academy in Frisco about anxiety and depression. It's obvious that anxiety and depression are prevalent issues affecting our culture today. One only has to read the latest headlines, look into the most up to date statistics, or have a conversation with someone you know....everyone seems to struggle with anxiety and depression at some point in their life. This is an issue I have talked about a lot, and I continue to talk about it, as it's something I am very passionate about. There are lots of angles to approach this topic, but the most important in my mind is that we reframe the conversation around anxiety and depression as one being about shame and something being wrong with someone...to it's something that affects all of us, and we need to be able to bring it out into the o

  • Some Relational Reflections on Genesis 1-4 (at the intersection of theology and psychology)

    02/02/2019 Duración: 36min

    As I mentioned in a previous podcast, I thought I would take some time this year (on occasion) to stop and reflect on my reading of the bible, and how it connects at the intersection of theology and psychology. So in this episode I want to take some time and just reflect on Genesis 1-4 and some insights that may be helpful for you and your relationships. Enjoy the episode. Books Mentioned in this Episode Creation and Fall: A Theological Exposition of Genesis 1-3 by Dietrich Bonhoeffer On Being Human: Essays in Theological Anthropology by Ray Anderson Exclusion and Embrace: A Theological Exploration of Identity, Otherness and Reconciliation by Miroslav Volf

  • Journals, Goal Setting, and a New Season of Podcasts

    01/02/2019 Duración: 27min

    It's been about 5 months since my last podcast episode, as I was needing to take a break for a while why I focused on some other goals.   But it's time for a new podcast season, and in this episode I talk about some new topics I am going to explore this season, as well as some new goals that I have been working on, and how I am using a paper journal to help me stay focused and on track. I hope that this episode motivates you in the new year, and gives you some new ideas to accomplish all that you set out to do.    

  • Letting the Silence Unfold Between You and Others

    19/09/2018 Duración: 18min

    "Love consists in this, that two solitudes, protect and border and salute each other." -- Rainer Maria Rilke   A couple of weeks ago my wife and I returned from a "marriage adventure" on the Inca Trail in Peru. This adventure (through WinShape and Intrepid), led us for four days and 3 nights hiking along the 33 miles to Machu Picchu. This was an unbelievable experience for my wife and I as we led four other couples on this marriage adventure. But probably one of the most transformative aspects of the trip was the moments (sometimes very long moments -- hours at a time) of silence as I walked along the trail. And what struck me most was the moments of silence between my wife and I. A comfortable silence where neither of us felt the need to talk or crack jokes, or lighten the levity with noise. But instead, it was that silence that drove me closer to God, and closer to her. And it was in that silence that I really grew.   In this episode I reflect on the importance of silence in relationships, which is somethin

  • God "Intermingles" All Things Together for Good

    23/08/2018 Duración: 23min

    As many of you know from listening to my podcasts, or reading my blog over the years, is I'm pretty obsessed with the novels of Susan Howatch. Particularly her Starbridge Series of which I'm about to finish my 9th reading of the series in the last 15 years. It's that impactful and transforming in my life.   But I talk about one book in particular in this podcast episode (Absolute Truths by Susan Howatch), and more specifically about one verse. The verse is Romans 8:28. The NIV translation is as follows:  And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.   The Scottish theologian William Barclay translated the verse the following way:   “God intermingles all things for good for those who love Him.” (Romans 8:28, translated by William Barclay)   I'm particularly drawn to this translation of the Greek text, especially as it tends to communicate that God takes all the bad and good, all the light and dark, all the negative and positive, and

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