Here's An Idea!

Podophiles, this episode is almost entirely about sex cults. Joining them, forming them, escaping them… you’re going to learn A LOT in this one, but how you apply that knowledge is up to you, your sister wives, their legions of children and the big man himself: Shaq.

CAUTION: This episode contains boys who do everything together, dick holsters, secret boners, jizz relays, porn preferences and locker room talk on The Oregon Trail. Please do not ingest this episode if you are pregnant, or might become pregnant, or have ever been pregnant, or have ever met a baby.

This week, The Boys™ try out their season 2 personas, and talk about which food they’d fornicate with, while Dumb God delivers his Dumb Commandments, Hollywood goes wild for “Gravity Too,” and Kris gives a recap of big date with Mrs. E. Finally, Game of Thrones is a soap opera, Dave gets American gifts and Obama’s impressive endowment is discussed.

In this VERY special episode, you get to be a fly on the wall as Kris and Mrs. Explosm go on their first date! That’s right, The Boys™ have pulled the ultimate prank on their other Boy™, Kris, and their otherworldly boss, Mrs. E., and set the two of them up on a blind date! Mrs. E. subjects Kris to the ultimate torture: Her company, AND making him write solo scripts!

This is highly irregular, but an additional Boy™ has entered the ring for this Email Hole and he refuses to be silent and let the professionals do their jobs. It’s Rob! Why!? Because he was there! The Boys™ answer your questions about Pagliacci, Studio Poopy Grill, Royal Rangers and everyone’s favorite phone aficionado, Android Pete. Strap in and say our classic catchphrase, “Cowabunga, I’m Bart!”

This is it, Podophiles! YOUR favorite “scripts” of season 1, numbers 5 through 1! Put on your counting caps and lace up your laughing boots, because The Boys™ are about to take you on a memory voyage to hilarity town. Bring dry socks too, ‘cause it’s gonna get wet! Ya know, WITH LAUGH TEARS!

The Podophiles voted for their favorite episodes of Season 1, and the Boys™ are contractually obligated to reminisce about them while feigning enthusiasm! Count along and downward from 10 to 6 as we reach into the old memory bucket and pull out whatever sort of bucket meats one would expect to find in a bucket!

This season 1 wrap up episode is about 2 things: 1) Hot Convos and 2) Twink Meat. Dave delights The Boys™ with tales of flat Earthers and the Great Dragon Ocean in The Sky, Kris terrifies with his tales of John MacAffe’s shit hammock, and Joel prepares to set Mrs. Explosm up with a MYSTERY MAN (it’s Kris). Start a milk fight with Aerosmith, it’s time to epi this logue!

In this 50th Episode GOLDEN ANNIVERSARY celebration of friendship, creative comradery, shared suffering and Stockholm Syndrome, The Boys™ reflect on the last year with cheers, jeers and beers full of tears. Mrs. Explosm has a special surprise for The Boys™ that takes them on a stroll down Suppressed Memory Lane.

The Boys™ are back (in town) to discuss sneaky air vent pranks, sleep paralysis ASMR, rappin’ in the suburbs, the POG incident, plugging volcanoes and garbage wrestlers. Settle down and have a long talk with your own body, or your own Illuminati, because it’s about to go down in a skull-shaped mountain, brother.

Aww Chimp Chimp, God Damn! The Boys™ try their best, but they spend most of the episode talking about chimps ripping the testicles off of their scientist masters. Other topics arise, like the Nintendo DS game “Lil’ Tuckin’ Momma,” but they just keep steering it back towards monkey ball ripping. Sorry? Later, there's a trio of Catholic school girls trying to be super cool and that part has almost nothing to do with monkeys mutilating genitals.

This week The Boys™ touch on how to eliminate The Royal Family (JK JK don’t put us on a list), rad mountain lion attacks, dick swords, getting sexy things confiscated, and the various exotic fauna of Ballycastle, Ireland. Spit your teeth into the bucket, it’s career day!

This week The Boys™ get so excited about Pig Nips and Steamed Milk Tits that they almost prolapse a bone! Kris proposes adding swords to UFC while the other boys pledge Virgin House and drink Gatorade out of a dick-shaped bottle. Also there’s A FULL ON MUSICAL! ABOUT BATMAN! ABOUT HIS BAT-NIPPLES, I MEAN!

These are dark times and The Boys are trying to focus on GOOD NEWS! Stuff like drunks dads, washed up dead whales, trees eating your sh*t for nourishment, North Korea buying your sh*t for… some reason, and dressing up your d*ck and balls as a pot o’ gold. GOOD NEWS!!!

Do you fall asleep to the soothing sounds of Alex Jones? Do you meow like a baby? Do you support mandatory blackface for all babies? Would you harass a substitute surgeon? If you answered “yes” to all, one or none of these questions, we have an exciting opportunity for you! It’s listening to this episode.

In this episode Dave and Joel learn that Chris Sabat was discovered ordering a chili dog, they check in with PooPoo and The Potty Boys on ‘Bidet Talk,’ Mark Zuckerburg breaks the Beast’s spell, IKEA Thunderdome plans are made and Chris Sabat does ZERO accents.

The boys are faced with a serious mystery… I mean a serious MR. E… or do I mean a serious MRS. E? You’re going to have to listen to get to the bottom of this confusing conundrum that may or may not partially take place on the moon.

It’s the Email Hole with Dave and Joel! Those boys get into that most taboo of subjects: SNEAKY TIME! Yes, the time time between around 1am and 4 am when no one’s awake, no laws apply and calories don’t count. Tiptoe downstairs and rifle through your fridge in the wee hours, because it’s about to get sneaky as all Hell!

I Want To Ask 13 Questions About Your Child’s Penis -- I’m not going to lie to you. A large portion of this episode is about the size, shape, color and various other attributes of Dave’s newborn son’s penis. It’s not gross or inappropriate. Think of it like a medical textbook. The boys also try to figure out which Rob-clone to kill, Kris’s new catchphrase for 2019 and the plot to Linkin Park Rangers.

Let’s get something straight. If you came here to listen to The Boys talk about mommy Facebook, Paul McCartney, a junebug superhero, Dave’s new baby, breast milk coffee, cheeky British underwear shows and late night TV dildo shopping, then you’re going to be pleasantly surprised. Everyone else, is OUT. OF. LUCK.