Crappy Friends

You're having a baby, and you don't want to become that mom who complains about…well, everything…to your childless by choice pals. How do you make sure you're still a good friend? Or maybe you've moved back to your partner's hometown, but all the ladies are friends already, and you feel left out. The Ladies have lots to say!

She acts like you're best friends, but you've never given her any reason to think that, aside from basic common courtesy. You can't ghost her completely, because you work for the same company. How can you get the message through without being downright mean? Also, Kristan shares about a surprise package one of her readers received. 

You were all friends, more or less, but now the other two are freezing you out. Was it something you said? Did? How can you live peacefully after being told they're just not that into you? In our second letter, the Ladies discuss a work friendship gone wrong, cliques and expectations.

You've been there for her through thick and thin, cheered for her, celebrated her…and when you need a little of that from her, there's…nothing. In this eloquent missive, our letter writer details a friendship that's kinda sorta weird, especially when it comes to her pal's husband…who was once in love with her. Oy! The drama!

You've had a best friend for almost your entire life, and she's been stellar. But tragically, she dies, and you and her sister bond in your shared grief. Then Sis lets something slip that throws you so off course you're utterly crushed and confused. The Ladies have a LOT to say on this letter, and not to worry, listeners. It's all positive.

Another "why did I spend so much time with this person?" letter, plus the reasons  we latch onto people, even when it's clear they're not good for us. The Ladies discuss the pressures and ideals that make women think they MUST have a BFF, and what can be wrong with this picture.

A complicated letter about a shy woman who finally makes a best friend, only to have her partner become more and more uncomfortable with the friendship. The Ladies discuss what seems to them to be a good friend and a potentially dangerous romantic relationship. TW: Isolating behavior bordering on abuse

Theoretically, we WANT to be that person who's like a cool auntie to our friend's kid. In reality…well. If you're wondering how to get out of that kindergarten graduation party of baby shower you just don't want to attend, listen up. The Ladies also discuss their casual style tips (pockets) and hints for avoiding unwanted guests (crawling).

Your best friend is getting married, and you're her maid of honor! It's lovely…but here's the thing. You recently started dating someone she once dated way back in high school, and now you're getting some weird vibes from the bride-to-be. How do you handle this without damaging a very precious friendship? The Ladies are confident it will all be well in the end (and if we're wrong, we definitely want to hear that story, too).

In which there is much cackling from the Ladies as they read an epic letter from a woman who can't seem to find a friend without some serious baggage, including but not limited to conspiracy theories and aliens. Why does she attract this type of pal? How can she pay more attention to the red flags earlier? And, more importantly, how can she find friends who are more balanced? Or does she really want that at all? The Ladies discuss, Joss is tipsy and suggestions are meted out nevertheless.

Oh, the many juicy problems with "Grace," not her real name! She's competitive, judgey, holier-than-thou…and the thing is, you adore her grown daughter, and vice versa! Can you sidestep the mom and just be friends with the now-adult girl you watched grow up? The Ladies think yes…but tread carefully.

In this episode, a caring friend is concerned her friend is getting TOO much therapy from too many sources while she seems to grow less and less happy. Does she speak up? Can she help in any way? Or should she just mind her own business?

You and your friend find yourself living in the same city. Problem is, you don't party like you used to, are trying to clean up your act and be an adult, and you're not sure this friend is going to help the cause. Does this mean you should gently part ways, or can this friendship survive in other ways? The Ladies weigh in, and Joss overshares her recent lip fungus.

TW: This episode deals with unwanted touching and intoxication. The National Sexual Assault Hotline number is 1-800-656-4673. What is the role of a friend when you're drunk and in a bad situation? What kind of reaction should a good friend offer? What expectations should you have in a crisis of this nature? 

She's in your friend group, this bitter, angry, self-centered drama queen, and she's telling you where and when you can show up and what the consequences will be if you disobey. Call the police? Or talk to the other friends? The Ladies recommend the latter with what we think is a pretty awesome solution.

You love your boyfriend, but you can't stand his friends…and especially his friend's baes, who seem to go out of their way to make you feel unwelcome. Really, really unwelcome. What do you say to your honey about the tricks, nastiness and exclusion you're dealing with? Is there a way to be friends with this pack of jackals?

Whoo-whee! The in-fighting, the ignored birthdays, the gossiping and bitchery in this neighborhood make the Ladies  bang our heads against the table. This letter writer and her friends give female friendship a bad name. Deliciously bad behavior all around!

How much consideration should your friends give you when you feel you're ultra-sensitive? How can you avoid feeling hurt and rejected when the issue may actually be a scheduling conflict and nothing more? The Ladies discuss how to avoid FOMO and that feeling of rejection when you're not included or just can't make it to an event.

Note to Selves: If you feel yourself wanting to scream, "Shut up, ____!!!!" during a conversation with a friend, it's generally not a good sign. The Ladies get the giggles over this one, and Kristan shares another wardrobe malfunction in front of an innocent man.

Ah, youth. Sometimes, they just don't know what to say (same is true with adults, of course). The Ladies weigh in on "Van-Nessing" a friend who recently came out and talk about how to negotiate those awkward waters when you're friends with both people and everyone is uncomfortable.