Crappy Friends

Here are ten ways good friends come through for each other. Are these the things you do for your pals? Do they do them for you?

Frenemies are those people who are nice on the surface but have ulterior motives for the friendship. Someone who gives us praise one moment, but spreads gossip about us the next. Someone we are never quite sure is on our side. Sometimes they are; sometimes they're not. You have a nagging feeling that they'll throw you under the bus at a moment's notice. and you're right; they will.

After a glass or two of California’s finest, Joss and Kristan discuss fictional female friendship (and the dearth thereof). Which TV character would they most want as their Chardonnay gal-pal, which movies and shows get it right, and how they both work to create strong female friendships in their books. 

She isn’t a bad person and has many lovely qualities…but there are certain habits that stand in the way of a better friendship. It might be you, it might be her, but you can do better, gosh darn it! How to address the bad habits that gum up an otherwise solid relationship.

Did you ever have a friend who needed so much from you? At first, things seemed great. Magical, almost. Then, cruel reality sets in, and you see that your friend is a black hole, never satisfied, always hurt that you’re not there enough for her. How to spot the warnings signs, and how to avoid the love at first sight syndrome.

Some women are survivors…and some are in a perpetual state of suffering. No matter what, their problems are worse the yours, the universe is out to get them, and your job is to listen…not that you can make a difference. Special guest: Dr. Khaleesi (not her real name), Ph.D., (yes, her real credentials) helps deal with this not-a-bad-person-but-endlessly-draining friend.

Comparison is the thief of joy, said Teddy Roosevelt, and the man knew a thing or two. What’s the difference between wanting some of the same things your friends have and true envy? Have you ever been resentful of a friend’s success on any level…or have you ever been surprised when a friend isn’t so happy for you when good things happen?

Sure, she’s got her flaws…but you’re immune because of your super-special friendship and sister-like bond. Or not. Do you have a friend who's just mean? She says cruel yet hilarious things and seems to get her jollies talking trash? Think because you're besties this behavior doesn't apply to you? Brace yourself, honey. It's just a matter of time before her true colors show.

We women tend to fall into female friendships with a skip and a sparkle. Hooray! A new friend! But what happens months (or years) later when you find yourself enmeshed in a crappy friendship with someone you never would’ve connected with if you’d known her better? Episode 1 talks about seeing the red flags in a friendship before it’s a huge mess…or making excuses for them and finding yourself in a bog of negativity.