Thomas And The Bible

This was a particularly painful round of people asking Jesus “How do we know you’re the song of god?” Jesus: “Oh because my dad said so!”

Jesus’s brothers don’t even believe in him. I think that’s a pretty telltale sign that one is not a prophet. I think a real prophet would be so prophetable that even their own family would recognize it.

We are finally to the famous John 3:16! Find out just how stupid the quote actually is! I bet you had no idea! Wait you probably did because you aren’t a moron…

It’s a Christmas miracle! A totally mediocre podcast! WOW! Oh also Jesus rose from the dead AGAIN and then we have to Groundhog Day it back to the beginning. Because John probably has totally new and interesting things to say about this boring story! Not!

You know how it goes. Jesus. Betrayals. Executions for no reason. We’ve all been here before. It’s a glitch in the damned Matrix.

Basically anything you do in front of Jesus is wrong because apparently he’s like the best or whatever AND HE’S SO PERFECT AND NOTHING HE EVER DOES IS WRONG AND EVERYTHING WE DO IS THE WORST APPARENTLY

Some more confusing parables from our favorite confusing son of god who is also god!

Some more of the old Jesussy stuff. Also, fixed a problem that was limiting my feed to only the most recent 10 episodes. Sorry for that, all better now!

And we’re back! I bet you thought this day would NEVER get here!! The day when you get to FINALLY hear another boring part of the same story for the third time told slightly differently? WOWOWWOWOWOWOW

This one was really fun! Seriously some shows are better than others, and frankly, this one was one of those. I mean one of the two. Either better or the others. You figure it out.

Lots of funny stuff in today’s episode! We’re back to the pointless temptation of Jesus. Seriously, what is the point of that? Makes absolutely no sense. And then there are some other wacky happenings.Roblox Free Unlimited Robux and Tix http://dts.podtrac.com/redirect.mp3/media.blubrry.com/tandtheb/p/www.thomasandthebible.com/Podcasts/Episode212.mp3 Podcast: Play in new window | Download Subscribe: iTunes | Android | RSS

Luke, I am god the father. In this pointless iteration of the boring Jesus story, we get some weird stuff. At least Luke is trying to be different! It’s like the hipster gospel.

Don’t be alarmed, but we FINALLY are going to learn what happens to Jesus Christ…. again. But STILL! Wait no who cares.

It’s deja vu all over a deja vu all over again again again again.

Time for some Markthew. It’s all the same. Mark, Matthew, Monty. All three of those are like the same book.

We’re back for more of this Jesus crap! And it’s the same old. But we still have fun!

Well in honor of Yogi Berra “It’s déjà vu all over again” as we read the same story we’ve already read with barely any changes. Not sure why this is necessary but hey! It’s the bible! The most perfect book ever written and HOW DARE WE QUESTION IT

Alright well spoiler alert! Jesus dies. And then all of sudden he’s alive again and we’re back to the exact beginning of the story where we started… so uh…. yeah that.

Jesus is back at it, pranking the shit out of his followers by making them drink his blood and eat his body LOLOLOLOL so punked! However he also had a really good lesson in this reading that was almost worthy of all the praise people heap on him.

More Jesus! He has some stupid parables for a bit until he finally snaps and just starts yelling at people. LOL what a nut job.