Eft/tapping Q & A Podcast W/ Gene Monterastelli - Emotional Freedom Techniques

One of the healthiest changes that has happened in the tapping world over the last decade is that we spend less time talking about the one-minute or one-session miracles. This sort of instant transformation does happen and it happens regularly. It just doesn't happen all the time! The reason I am happy that we no longer talk in those terms is because it creates unrealistic expectations for tapping. Assuming that tapping always works quickly means that when it doesn't, we think we are doing something wrong, or tapping doesn't work, or it won't work for our particular issue. Even with a healthy expectation of the speed of healing and transformation, we can still hold unrealistic hopes for a round of tapping or the healing process. This week in the podcast, we look at the rate of healing, how we can measure it to gauge whether we are on the right track and how to avoid creating unrealistic (and harmful) expectations. If you have a regular tapping practice, I highly recommend listening to this episode. Support th

As a tool, tapping is such a powerful way to tune in to our emotions. Feeling, processing, and moving through emotions is a key part of the healing and transformational experience. At the same time, there is a certain capacity to our emotional experience. Feeling deeply is a powerful part of transformation until it becomes too much. I have often heard my clients describing this experience like trying to drink from a fire hose. It is just too much, too fast. It can be scary and disorienting to feel completely overwhelmed in this way. After experiencing your emotions getting the better of you will mean that you learn to be on guard. It is good for us to be wary unless it means we become so cautious that we stop moving forward in our healing journey. This week in the podcast, I share with you what to do when the fear of being too emotional is holding back your healing. Using this process means you can strike a balance between not being overwhelmed and allowing deep and powerful healing to take place. Support the

You know you'd benefit from some tapping, so you sit down ready to get into it. You want it to work…but as soon as you start, your mind goes blank. You freeze because you can't think of the right words to use. After a few minutes, you give up, thinking you must be doing it wrong. This happens to everyone, even experienced tappers, and I want to reassure you that it does not mean you are bad at tapping. Why Your Mind Goes Blank Several things cause a freeze response. Feeling overwhelmed leads to mental shutdown. Trying to get it "right" creates performance pressure. Fear of going too deep triggers protection mode. Past experiences with scripted tapping have taught you that precision equals success. Your internal voice tells you: "I should know what to say by now. But if I don't have the perfect words, this won't work." This thinking is all wrong. Words Are Not the Magic The tapping itself is the power that creates transformation, not the specific words. Tapping works by calming your nervous system and changing

brutal truth nobody talks about in the self-help world: The healing and transformational work never ends. Every breakthrough just reveals a fresh layer of issues to be worked through. It would be wonderful if one day I was done, but I am open to the fact that it's an ongoing process. For me, the single toughest place in the transformational and healing process is when I feel like I am starting over again. And calling it tough is an understatement. Finding myself back at the beginning is frustrating, disappointing, demoralizing, devastating and, for me, the worst part is the shame I feel. My shame is because it feels like such a personal failing. I know what to do, I know how to do it, I was doing the work, and now that I am back at the beginning, there is only one person to blame: ME! This week in the podcast I am sharing what I've learned after years of experiencing this cycle myself and seeing it in my clients. It will shift your whole perspective, helping you to get your mojo back to do the work and reinfo

When you have been through something hard, such as grief, trauma, or a season of disconnection in your life, it is easy to forget what wholeness feels like. You lose touch with the part of you that still knows peace, still feels love, and still remembers who you were before the story changed. In this episode, I talk with Sarah Tobin about what it means to remember yourself. Not in a vague or inspirational way, but as an intentional, embodied healing process. Sarah’s journey with tapping began after the loss of her daughter. What followed was a deep and personal transformation that led her to write a book designed to help others reconnect with themselves. This is not just about feeling better, it is about living more truthfully. Sarah makes a clear case for tapping as a spiritual tool that is well beyond its use as a tool for emotional regulation. We explore how healing is both an act of self-compassion and a choice to take responsibility for your path forward. Key Takeaways From the Conversation: Tapping he

When you were first taught how to tap, more than likely you were asked to tune in to your issue in some form or fashion. You might have been asked to describe where you feel it in your body, what it reminds you of, or to rate its intensity on a 0–10 scale. These are all great ways for us to focus our attention, which improves the value of each round of tapping. While these ways work well, they all assume that we can identify an issue to tune in to, even if it is something small. But what happens when it feels like there is nothing to grasp? You know there is an issue but when you sit down to tap for it there is nothing to tune in to. There are no memories, no physical sensations, or anything at all. Sometimes we draw a blank, or even just feel numb. When this happens and we have no focus, it is much harder to start tapping. In this week's podcast I share how to start tapping when you are feeling nothing so that you aren't wasting your time or effort. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support [playe

I know this sounds strange, but you’re not afraid tapping won’t work. You’re actually afraid it might. In this episode, I dig into a truth that has come up repeatedly in my conversations with clients and students. Even when we know how powerful tapping can be, something inside stops us from doing it as often as we could. That something, I’ve come to realize, is fear of change itself. It’s not that we don’t want to heal and to experience the change it brings. But even positive change feels uncertain and uncertainty feels unsafe to the subconscious, which is always on alert for what might go wrong. So instead of leaning in, we hesitate. We stay stuck. This week, I share a simple, powerful way to get underneath that resistance. It starts with just one sentence: Even though I know it’s not logically true, emotionally it feels unsafe to be successful because... That single prompt can open up space where you feel stuck, even if nothing else has worked before. Not only do I explain how using the phrase is the key to

One of the most common questions I receive is "Can we use tapping to help the animals we love?" The answer is a resounding YES! But in order for tapping to work well, we first need to know the most useful approach. Tapping for our animals isn't just a matter of looking at our animals and tapping. While that can be useful, there are better ways to get results. This week in the podcast, I am going to share with you the surprising place it's best to start when tapping for the animals in our lives. Then I will reach you with a simple three-step framework that I use every time I am tapping for animals. If you find this approach useful, please join me for a deeper dive into the topic on Sunday, August 3rd at 2 PM Eastern US. Full details and sign up here: http://TappingForPets.com Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube

One of my favorite questions when interviewing someone about their tapping journey is, "If you could share one piece of advice with your younger self, what would that advice be?" For some reason I was reflecting on that question recently, not for someone I was interviewing, but for myself. The piece of advice that I would give to Gene-the-beginner-tapper would be to go more slowly. This week in the podcast, I share four different ways that I now move more slowly when I am tapping on my own or with clients. All four of them have transformed the way I tap for the better. Not only do I think these ideas would be useful for the younger version of myself, but I know that they will make your tapping more effective as well! Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support [player] Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube  

Finding a balance between taking responsibility for our lives and taking too much responsibility for what is going on is a tricky matter. Taking too much responsibility may seem like a silly notion, but it can happen in many ways. One of these ways is when we refuse to allow ourselves grace or forgiveness. We recognize that we have made a mistake and then, whether consciously or unconsciously, we decide that we are not allowed to get past it. As part of our penance we beat ourselves up, thinking it will lead to us making better choices in the future. When we think about the context of the mistake we think, "That is just an excuse. I should have done better!" It is possible for us to know that we could have done better AND to recognize the context at the same time. We aren't making an excuse when we do this, but we are giving an explanation. In this week's podcast, I explore the difference between excuses and explanations. Understanding the key difference between the two will help to find a path that includes

One of the ideas that really makes my clients bristle is the possibility that their self-sabotaging behaviors are guided by their system's well-meaning intention to keep them safe. They question, "How is it possible that my subconscious mind thinks it is trying to keep me safe when all it is doing is making my life harder?" That is a great question because it feels counterintuitive that our desire to be safe is actually holding back our progress. This week in the podcast, we explore why the subconscious mind gets in the way in trying to keep us safe AND the first step to overcoming this common issue. I believe that this is one of the most important concepts in all of tapping and if you aren't doing it, you are slowing your progress and also limiting your tapping results. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support [player] Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube  

For some issues, tracking progress is simple. I can tell if my desk is less cluttered, if I can lift more weight while working out, or if I am making more sales in my business. That is because these examples are measured in hard metrics, or in other words, cold, hard numbers. Changes that are measured in soft metrics are more difficult to track. For example, it is much harder to quantify growth in my self-esteem or confidence. Much of the transformation we are trying to achieve with tapping is measured in soft metrics. Because it is hard to measure, it can escape our notice and therefore is more likely to be missed. And that results in us thinking that change isn't happening at all, because we don't see it. This can undermine our healing and can demotivate us from tapping more. In this week's podcast, we explore three simple ways we can more accurately track soft metrics and recognize our progress. In turn, this leads to more tapping, which (most importantly) results in more healing and transformation. This u

One of our biggest struggles in creating transformation and change in our lives is those moments where we know WHAT to do, we know HOW to do it, and we know WHY it is valuable to take an action…and yet we just don't. It is obvious what the next step is and for some reason we don't take it. Then, as a bonus, we beat ourselves up for not taking action. So as well as not moving forward, we feel bad for letting ourselves down. This week in the podcast we explore where this resistance comes from, how to overcome it and (just as importantly) we will tap for all the emotions that come up when we let ourselves down. If you are trying to create change in your life, then you must listen to this episode. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube

One of Marianne Williamson's most cited quotes starts "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure." It is quoted so often because of how deeply it resonates, speaking directly to the contradiction that is part of our lived human experience. On one hand we want to live an authentic and rich life…on the other hand, our subconscious mind just wants us to be safe. This desire to be safe keeps us small because if we are small, then we aren't seen, and if we aren't seen, then we are safe. This week in the podcast, we explore the three biggest subconscious fears that keep us small and we do lots of tapping to clear those resistances. Description Libsyn & Wordpress Body: Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio  

Letting ourselves down is one of the deepest betrayals that we humans can experience. It feels like such a harsh gut punch when it is something we know we should have been able to do. After we let ourselves down in such a powerful way, our subconscious will do everything in its power, through resistance to take action so as to keep us safe. It reasons that since it was so painful to let ourselves down, the way to avoid that pain in the future is simply not to commit to something better. Intellectually we know this is a bad plan, but the resistance will persist, trying (and often succeeding) to hold us back. This week in the podcast we look at why we created this resistance, how to overcome it in the moment, and how to avoid it in the future. If you are serious about healing and transformation, clearing the resistance to making commitments to yourself is essential. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio |

The words change and improve are very close in meaning. While both are associated with transformation, they do not mean exactly the same thing. Improvement is about keeping something but doing it in a better way; change is about doing something in a new way. In the transformational arena we long for change, but in doing this we sometimes diminish the value of improvement. This week in the podcast, I explore the difference between these two ideas, when we should seek to improve or to change, and how best to bring these goals to our tapping practice. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio | YouTube

Not all stress is created equal. There are those hyper stressful times, like driving on icy roads in a snowstorm at rush hour. It is super intense in the moment and then when it ends, it is over! Then there is the low-grade stress of something that is taking a long time and is hanging over your head. The example I think of from my own life is doing my business taxes. I'm not especially good at doing my taxes because I only look at the task once a year; it is also a big deal and if I make a mistake, there can be major consequences. This is a stress that is ever-present and feels oppressive, but is not all-consuming. It also doesn't last forever because at some point my taxes will be filed and I will be able to move on…until the next year! Finally, there is the type of stress that never seems to end. When thinking about this type of stress, I think about a postal worker sorting mail. No matter how hard they work, there will always be more mail coming down the conveyor belt for them to sort. There is the pressur

One of the most consistent struggles my clients have is coming up with the "right" words. The problem is there is no such thing as the right words when it comes to tapping. Instead there are useful words and unuseful words. I am consistently surprised at some of the types of words that end up being useful. One such type of surprising words is when we are tapping on phrases that we intellectually know not to be true. When I ask my clients to tap on phrases that they know aren't true this is natural resistance. One on level it doesn't feel logical and on another there can be the fear that we are tapping in something bad or untrue. This week in the podcast I explore the power of tapping on phrases that we know intellectually are untrue and how to get the most out of doing exactly that. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

Grief is unlike all other emotions when it comes to tapping. Every other negative emotion is something we can step out of. I can stop feeling angry, frustrated, or overwhelmed. Grief on the other hand is something that we are going to feel forever. Twenty years after a loved one has died we are still going to feel pangs of grief. Instead of leaving grief, we have an evolving relationship to it and how we live with it. Because this is the case it requires a different approach when we are tapping. This week in the podcast I explore the unique nature of grief and how you can use tapping to heal our relationship to it. Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio  

We often refer to tapping for stress and feeling overwhelmed as emotional first aid. That is because we are applying a tool for quick relief in the moment in the same way we would use first aid for a physical injury. But there is one key difference between first aid and emotional first aid. When we are physically injured, our first thought is "I need to take care of this right now!" When we need emotional first aid, we are so caught up in our emotions that we don't realize we need to do something about what we are feeling. Listen to this week's podcast to learn how to use tapping as an emotional first aid tool and how to ensure you reach for tapping in the moments you most need it. Because it doesn't do you any good to know how to tap for stress, but don't actually do it! Following these simple steps will ensure you tap more and short circuit stress and overwhelm promptly. Description Libsyn & Wordpress Body: Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support   Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone |