Tom Rhodes Radio Smart Camp

Grab some fruit and let me take you to Peru.   Have you eaten a peach lately?  Try eating slices of one while alternating bites with slices of mango. If you can do it while sitting in your underwear in the sun like I did then you are a true champion of summer in my book. In this episode I talk about Willie Nelson's new record 'First Rose Of Spring', George Carlin, The Wrong Missy, Eurovison Song Contest, Mean Girls, Booksmart, John Muir and his use of the word "Sambo", The Portland Riots and the leaf blowers sending back the CS gas to the unmarked federal agents. I also talk about my book that I'm writing and read to you one of the best parts of my Peru chapter. What could be better than that? Hearing all about my best moment while filming for a Travel TV show in Peru on assignment. Let your brain relax and allow my words to take you to Amantani island on Lake Titicaca. I got to experience the sacred ceremony of Pacha Mama (Mother Earth) with the local villagers and I wrote all about it for my book and now yo

The best thing you can do with bad memories is to pave over them with good ones.   This was my mom's last week in California so after four months of not leaving my neighborhood I rented a car and we blazed up the highway to Sequoia national park. During a life threatening virus outbreak it is good to look at 3,000 year old Sequoia trees and be reminded that the earth survives and life goes on.  We learned what not to do if you are attacked by a bear, cougar or struck by lightning. Our next trip to the Huntington library was a bust and we were turned away for not having reservations. For the 4th of July we drove up to Santa Barbara and discovered this gem of Spanish architecture with a gorgeous beach and vibrant pier. Because the fireworks were canceled we drove back home in time to catch all of the illegal fireworks being shot off that can be seen from my building. Thank God for the criminals of Los Angeles who provided the celebratory entertainment. On our last day today my mom crushed me 237-210 in our Mom

In this bleak and anxious world there is still so much joy and beauty to discover.   My mom and I have successfully completed watching every art and educational program that I have and here and now we will delight you with all of the knowledge that we have just learned. In this episode we talk about Matisse, Picasso, Eugene Delacriox, Toulouse Lautrec, Antonio Guadi, Mother hummingbirds, Birds of Paradise and big cats. Our conversation reaches its crescendo of excitement when we talk about lions, cheetahs, jaguars, pumas, leopards and lynx. Many minds will be blown when you hear about the little known facts of the big cat family and hearts will be warmed when you learn about our favorite trees in my neighborhood, which are the African Tulip tree, the Monterey Cypress tree and the Persian Silk tree. Give your brain a ride on easy street with all of the best knowledge that my mother and I have gathered for you this week. Hooray for moms! Hooray for humanity! And as my mom would say, yay us!

With helicopters circling overhead, I wish you a happy end of slavery day! My mom is a true champion and the current reigning champion of our Scrabble competition. Mother and child is one of the eternal themes of art and that is the theme of my podcast right now as my mother and I search the history of world art to bring you the happiest and most interesting stories we could find for you this week. In this episode we talk about how art made the world, Stonehenge, Persepolis, Alexander the Great, Roman Emperor Augustus and Gilgamesh.  We then take you on a tour of Vatican City and The Louvre before ending with a celebration of the life of Georgia O'Keefe and her scandals that rocked the art world when she was a young artist and another when she was a mature artist. In my never ending search for heroes I'm happy to present you with these words: "A hero can not define himself a hero. A hero is defined by the actions they undergo. A hero is defined by the events that happen to them. The spiritual and moral respo

During the rut the males exhibit tough guy behavior in order to attract a mate, me myself I always preferred dancing.   In these frightening uncertain times it is always good to be reminded of the good that humans have done while working together. That is why my mom and I have been watching the PBS docu series 'Great Museums of America'. In this episode we talk about and celebrate the best stories and information we learned from: The Metropolitan Museum of Art The Colorado History Museum The California Surf Museum The Molly Brown House The Gene Autry Museum of Western Heritage The Museum of Modern Art The George Eastman House The Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum The Smithsonian Institute The Morris Museum of Art The National Zoo The Franklin Institute The Whale Museum The New York City Fire Department Museum The Henry Ford Museum "Everything is soon to be history, therefore everything is collectable." Strive to be a better human in all that you do. Shalom Amigos y amigas!

In times of tragedy is when human beings show their best sides and their most compassionate sides. Now is the time to speak out and demand that everyone shows a better side of themselves.

When was the last time you let out a good yodel? You can yodel as my mom and I take you on an audio tour of the best museums in America... while wearing face masks of course.   Join me now for a few happy yodels and a celebration of knowledge as my mother and I take you on a tour of the best museums in America according to PBS. First you will learn how yodeling became a part of country music and how I got my oldest most authentic country music albums from a deceased black woman from Jamaica. My mother and I have been walking up and down each neighborhood street in my area and we got to experience for the first time being in a bank with everyone in the bank wearing face masks. My mom loves the stencil sidewalk graffiti all over Los Angeles, especially the updated Covid 19 graffiti on Melrose ave. I greatly appreciate the joy of getting a package and today I got a massive box from my friend Jasper in Delft, The Netherlands. Holland lives in my heart forever and my friend Jasper sent me a big box full of love th

"There is nobody I'd rather have with me in a beer hall brawl than my mother standing beside me with a broken beer bottle in her hand."   On our daily walks around my neighborhood my mother and I have been amazed by the exotic plant life and my mom wondered how it was possible that desert plants can survive and thrive next to plants that are predominantly in the North East of the United States. We stopped into the plant store on Beverly Blvd. to ask and the man who worked there said, "Plants here don't follow plant rules." I thought that was a funny image of our biker gang exotic flowers not following the rules of others.    In this episode my mom and I talk about the good things we have been putting into our brains in the form of the documentaries we have been watching and the books that we have read. We talk about the BBC's 'The Adventure Of English', all about the history of the English language and we learn the mind blowing story of Squanto, the Native American who spoke English and kept the Mayflower pil

If my mom ran Hollywood every movie would end with the family all going to church more often.   The great virus lockdown film festival continues! In this batch of films that my mother and I have watched we discovered that we both love any movie with Jeff Bridges or Clint Eastwood in it. We also discover that my mom won't stomach certain things and is not afraid to ask me to stop a film if she really doesn't like it. You can say what you want about Woody Allen but in not one of his films does anyone ever take a shit in the middle of the road in a wedding dress like happens in the Judd Appatow film. This week for us has seen us loosen our restrictions and start taking walks through my neighborhood every day. It is good for our souls to feel the sunshine on our face, cool breezes on our hair and to see how many extraordinary fig trees are living in my neighborhood. Each night we watch a film and in this conversation today we talk about the 25 films we have watched in the last 25 nights.  It is a hardy feast of m

The thing I love most about England is that they still put ugly people on television.   It has been a great week to learn some shit and my mother and I stuffed our heads with beautiful art knowledge and thanks to the BBC, we took a quest around the world for humankind's greatest achievements. First we talk about this past week in captivity as I undertook the task of sorting out and categorizing my boxes full of old paper photographs.  For the longest time I had wanted to categorize my photos separately in travel, comedy and family sections. Along with this labor came the joy of bagging up ex girlfriends and put them in a box and stuff that box in the deepest corner of my darkest closet. My mom said "Its like cleaning out the cobwebs from the corners of your life." I want to be clear that this doesn't include Ashna, because our whole history in photos is all digital, because she was my wife and because her and I are still friends. Also, Ashna still edits and produces this podcast and there were no dark corners

When I was a kid my mom would ask "Are you ready for the best feeling in the world?" Right before dumping a warm basket of clothes over my head fresh out of the dryer.   "No one volunteers to fight in a war who is happy at home."   It is from my mom that I get my love of books and since she arrived here on March 9th she has crushed five books here at the Rhodes library:   Joan of Arc by Mark Twain Go Tell It On The Mountain by James Baldwin Picasso by Gertrude Stein The Success And Failure Of Picasso by John Berger Paris At The End Of The World by John Baxter   In this episode my mom and I talk about the books she just read and the one she just started, Fatal Shore by Robert Hughes. We also talk about our time together in this global lockdown and relive happy memories like when I was a kid my mom would ask "Are you ready for the best feeling in the world?" Right before dumping a warm basket of clothes over my head fresh out of the dryer. We also talk about the art documentaries we have watched so far in our p

Hooray for moms! What good is money if you can't spend it on your mom? On April 15, 2020 my mother turned 81 years old and we recorded this conversation together under virus quarantine lockdown. My mother and I have had a beautiful relationship through the years and she has shared all of my triumphs and sorrows as I have shared hers. I love taking trips with her and we have been fortunate to experience together, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Amsterdam, Rome, Zurich, Buenos Aires and Jerusalem but the unexpected joy of having her with me here in Los Angeles as my bunker partner for great virus lock down of 2020 is the most serendipitous event of my lifetime. From my mother I get my thoughtfulness and she is my hero not only because she has survived so much to make it to where she is today, but because she taught me how to love, and to love fully. Since the stay at home orders went down my mom and I have a very nicely structured day. In the morning we talk and read our books over coffee and then after breakfast I

Is the threat of our possible human extinction bringing you down? This is a big shot of love and sunshine from the Rhodes library. When this stink ball of shit virus shut down the world my dearly loved 80 year old mother was visiting me and I got lucky to be riding out this storm with her. Had she not been visiting me at this moment we both would have been alone for this and probably each of us would have been more casual in our attitude because of the virus. Because getting her through this alive is my main priority I love my combat preparedness that I consider when I have to go out for supplies.   I love cooking all of our meals and I've learned that as a son I have many duties to my mother but letting her win at Scrabble is not one of them. You've never seen someone get so trounced at Scrabble as I have so soundly been beating her. Qi baby! Qi is a word and you should remember that because if played right it is a crusher. This is a special time now if you are spending it with someone you love. My heart smi

"You can be whoever you want to be in America, in your gated community, away from all those dirty poor people who might cast judgement on you."   My own personal golden girl, Lynn Ruth Miller stops by the Rhodes library to share the best lessons she has learned in life and to tell me about her new life living in London and performing all over the world. After getting fucked by #wellsfargo bank on a refinancing scam she lost her house and disgusted with the ruthless nature of American capitalism she moved to England at 80 years old to take a chance on having a comedy career there. After a bumpy start in Brighton she is making a name for herself in London and now performing all over the world. "I don't think enough sympathy has been shown to the Germans for what they went through in World War II." "It must have been hell being a man in the 1950s. You had to work to support a home and family and you had to please a demanding wife." "Now is the best time to be alive because you can be whatever gender you want now

  "If you tried to govern people by the rules of the bible it would be a bloody mess and women would be treated like property."   TRR # 320 Under the circus tent of knowledge with Dan Cummins!  Listen here > https://bit.ly/37hmW4C     Dan Cummins is a comedian that I love, respect and admire. He is the rare human that I can blaze any trail with mentality on any topic and we both dazzle each other with valuable knowledge nuggets.   Dan left Los Angeles and moved back home to Idaho, "Playboy of all brands brought our family back home." Since then Dan has created a handsome podcast empire with his "Time Suck" podcast.    Dan tells me about the sexually liberated intellectuals he had the best conversations with during his time working for Playboy television. We talk here about the brothers Grim fairy tales, Disney films, Ted X talks, how going dark gets you more followers than going light, Josephine Baker, John Dillinger, Bonnie and Clyde, the Jumbo appendages possessed by Lyndon Johnson and Rasputin, Vlad the Im

Rejoice in the glory that is the words and thoughts of Henry Miller! One of the greatest American writers all time. Your zest for life begins here! Eddie Pepitone and I celebrate the author Henry Miller, one of the best human examples to follow the path of the artist and smile in the face of struggle. “The Rosy Crucifixion trilogy is basically about being crucified on the cross of love”. Learn how the act of creativity is the way to pull out of your darkest moments in life and return to the light. “I have no money, no resources, no hopes. I am the happiest man alive”. The best writings of Henry Miller should be assembled into a single book and made into the new bible and placed in hotel rooms all over the world. "I want to write something that has real guts. Real hard realism. If every man wrote down what was his real truth the entire world word explode. Open yourself up and be super vulnerable in order to achieve your self liberation. Release the inner angel within! The theory of artistic creativity, when yo

"How you are on the golf course is how you are in real life, if you cheat on the golf course you will cheat in real life."   Alex Thomas and I met when we toured Israel together. I brought my mother on that tour and Alex brought his family because we both wanted to share the experience with the people we loved most. This conversation was recorded last week before the tragic death of Kobe Bryant. In this episode we talk about how the Republicans now are the 1919 Chicago Black Sox because they are all in on the fix. Alex is the self proclaimed Ghetto Tiger Woods or the black Bob Hope. "How you are on the golf course is how you are in real life, if you cheat on the golf course you will cheat in real life." "The bible is my favorite book, I was taught and value integrity, I believe in karma and the golden rule." Who was this guy Mulligan that was so bad at golf that the one fuck up do over is named after him? An amazing fact about Alex is that his father was 'Wind' in Earth, Wind & Fire. Alex grew up with the

"If we are to survive as a human race we have to hide our hatreds, we have to find things we have in common if we want to progress and move forward."   I first met Shazia Mirza in 2002 when I had my late night talk show in Amsterdam when we did shows around The Netherlands together. I was riding high with the dream TV job and Shazia was a cultural juggernaut at the time because she was playing a pro terrorism Muslim character on stage with her one liners and was getting a lot of media coverage at the time. When we met on this tour Shazia had a reporter from the Guardian following her and writing a story about her. It was a very exciting time for both of us in our careers and even though we are both from very different cultures we bonded because we are in the same tribe of stand up comedy. "The Jews have a great history of producing comedians, so do the Catholics, we have never had a history of comedians. Islam is a new religion and so is our comedy and satire. It takes time before you can laugh at something."

Shantaram with Jake Johannsen "I would never commit a felony, I am strictly a misdemeanor guy." Jake Johannsen comes to the Rhodes library to talk about his favorite book 'Shantaram' by Gregory David Roberts. In this conversation we talk about people losing the sparkle in their eyes in Hollywood, how Kurt Vonnegut will improve your life and how Kurt Vonnegut is to Jake what James Brown is to me. I teach Jake the 8 words of Spanish that saved me from getting ripped off by cops and I tell him about the one and only time I have ever been in jail which was when I was 19 years old in Little Rock, Arkansas. That weekend I spent in jail at 19 was very influential in my life because I would never commit a felony, I am strictly a misdemeanor guy.  In this episode we weigh the benefits of martial arts versus carrying mace and how in life, just like when you are dealing with a heckler, using kindness and charm is always the best course of action.We talk about how instagram is better than twitter because no one is going

Everyday my prayer is the same... God please make me less of an asshole. That is also my New Year's resolution, to try to be less of an asshole. The epidemic of modern assholishness is something I am not immune to and I was an unrelenting asshole recently when I appeared on the Tom & Dan podcast when I was back in Orlando during the holidays.The tidal wave of internet hate that followed let me know that plenty of people thought I was a turd. Also when I was back home I met the family of the soldier who had committed suicide who I had witnessed a year before experiencing peak grief at MCO airport. At the moment I saw them it reminded me of how I felt when I lost my sister and it put into perspective that pain from a divorce is a minor thing in comparison to having a loved family member plucked from you out of this life. While at home I had the realization that none of us should ever identify as Republican or Democrat, we should only indentify ourselves as friend, brother, son, husband or the female equival