Zen Parenting Radio

Todd and Cathy discuss the pressure children feel around homework and how we can support them rather than increase their anxiety. They process the meaning of inner disarmerment and why this individual practice will lead to a change in our immediate surroundings and world (outer disarmerment). They also discuss Mr. Mom, the Rocky movies, and Todds new coaching education.

Cathy and Todd discuss why it’s important to stay expand when we are in fear or crisis rather than contract and shut down. We have the capacity to function and make heart-centered choices even when we are afraid. They also discuss Mockingjay Part 2, Planes, Trains, and Automobiles, and a great question from a listener regarding the many different paths to “success”.

Cathy and Todd discuss talking to kids about tragic events such as the recent terrorist attack. They also discuss 10 things every middle schooler should know, and answer a few listener questions about sensitivity and technology. Click here to read Cathy’s blog about what to do after Paris.

Cathy and Todd discuss why children like to have something of their own to feel “special", and why it helps to normalize these feelings rather than shame them into thinking differently. They also discuss why normalizing feelings is reliant on the parent’s self understanding, and why it’s important to frame the world, experiences, and opportunities as abundant rather than limited.

In the 2nd half of this interview with Dr. Duffy, we talk about issues specific to teen-agers and our the topics covered includes empowering our sons, Brene Brown, and how to "manage" the boys who come to take out your teenage daughter. HINT- It does not include a shotgun over the fireplace and other difficulties of being a teenager in this day and age.

Todd and Cathy discuss criticism, why it hurts so much and why it’s an inevitable part of life. They discuss why it’s important to speak up, even in the face of criticism, and how to offer constructive criticism rather than blame and guilt. They share personal stories about how they talk to each other about their pain, and why most of the pain stems from childhood. They discuss the wisdom of Elizabeth Gilbert and cartoonist Lynda Barry and how they deal with criticism in their creative lives.

That is a quote from Dr. Duffy who visits us again in this two-part interview. We talk about issues specific to teen-agers and our the topics covered includes suicide, drugs and alcohol, technology, depression, and the difficulties of being a teenager in this day and age.

Cathy and Todd share some reactions to their kids behavior, why it’s important to recognize how you feel before your respond, and why understanding your response will keep you self-aware. They also discuss privilege, their upcoming interview with Dr. John Duffy, and why Todd thinks he’s being duped by strawberry companies.

Cathy and Todd discuss what it means to live above and below the line, a consciousness tool taught by Jim Dethmer from the Conscious Leadership Group. Above the line means you think from a place of abundance, creativity, and openness, while below the line means you think defensively and rigidly and with a constant need to be right. This understanding affects our understanding of the workplace, our parenting, and most importantly ourselves.

Cathy and Todd discuss the importance of grieving, the value of “keening”, and a listener asks a question steming from Susan Stiffelman’s book, Parenting with Presence. Todd shares his favorite quote about personal responsibility, Cathy tells a serendipitous story about the conference she attended, and they somehow work in Six Feet Under and Terminator 2.

Cathy and Todd discuss why it can be challenging for families when kids are involved in youth team sports or travel leagues. They also discuss why valuing relationship above all else will make decision making so much easier, and why leaders who value relationship are the most successful.

Cathy and Todd discuss the effectiveness of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and why it’s more powerful than just focusing on behavior. They also discuss Tara Mohr’s five new takeaways about mindfulness and lovingkindness, and why Elizabeth Gilbert thinks fear is “boring”.

Cathy and Todd share the words of a 6-year-old girl who wants her divorced parents to stop fighting. She offers wisdom beyond her years, and wakes us up to what children know and what we need to remember. Her words are a form of grace, and being open to her words will deepen your awareness and remind you that grace often comes from the most uncommon places – other people, a sunset, an animal, or simply the willingness to notice what has always been there.

Cathy and Todd discuss the life-changing mindfulness research of Ellen Langer, author and professor from Harvard who has been researching mindfulness (and mindlessness) since the 70’s. She defines mindfulness as paying attention and being able to notice new things, while recognizing that experiences are based on the words and ideas that we attach to them. Ellen Langer was interviewed by Krista Tippet for the On Being Podcast. They also talk about different ways of dealing with sibling rivalry. Todd unveils his new technique in dealing with children being unkind towards one another.

Cathy and Todd discuss Brenè Brown’s new book Rising Strong and focus on the first step, The Reckoning. Reckoning is how we engage and become curious about our feelings, our willingness to practice emotional intelligence. If we do not engage our feelings, if we deny and disengage, then our emotions “don’t go away; instead, they own us, they define us…” (from Rising Strong).

Cathy and Todd pay tribute to Wayne Dyer by sharing his Ten Secrets, and explain how Wayne influenced their lives and millions of others. They also discuss the Beastie Boys, Batdad, and why they dance before taping a podcast.

Cathy and Todd discuss what it means to be present, and how this knowledge can be turned into daily practice. They also discuss their differences when it comes to filling up a Saturday, why it’s important to dance with our fear, and why the Humans of New York Facebook page wakes us up to the world.

Girls tend to read books with male protagonists (Harry Potter, Diary of a Wimpy Kid), but do boys read books with female protagonists? Todd and Cathy ask this question, as well as how men respond to female leads in movies and television (specifically their recent experience after seeing the movie Trainwreck, and why Amy Poehler once got mad at Jimmy Fallon in the SNL writer’s room). They also talk about Who’s the Boss, Family Ties, and why IBM and Netflix are changing their family policies.and they talk about Amy Schumer’s Football Town Nights sketch and why humor can open up important conversations.

*May not be appropriate for children* Cathy and Todd discuss John Oliver’s most recent rant on Last Week Tonight about sex education. He makes vital points about why abstinence-only education doesn’t work for all, why there's no required standards for sex education around the country, and why shame/guilt/fear do not change sexual behavior, they only negatively impact the way people feel about themselves. They also discuss why Elizabeth Smart believes abstinence-only sex ed can be harmful, and they talk about Amy Schumer’s Football Town Nights sketch and why humor can open up important conversations.

Cathy and Todd discuss why some people grow from difficult times, and why some people stay stuck and feel victimized by their experiences. They discuss the power of personal responsibility and why taking care of yourself and moving through challenge is a natural and necessary part of human evolution.