Eft/tapping Q & A Podcast W/ Gene Monterastelli - Emotional Freedom Techniques

Our working lives can be stressful. The last thing we want to do is bring that stress and worry home. Here is a great little tapping technique that you can do every day before you leave work that will only take a few minutes. It will ensure that you leave any work stress behind so you can go home and enjoy the rest of your evening.

I want you to imagine you are meeting someone for the very first time. They know nothing about you. You have to describe yourself to that person, but you can only use one word descriptions. Which words would you use? Father, wife, grandson, teacher, loving, hopeful... The labels we give to ourselves can powerfully influence our behaviour. In this interview I chat with Brad Yates about the positive and negative identities we create and how we can use tapping to transform the way we see and define ourselves.

There are times when we find ourselves caring for someone who is going through something major, be it a physical or mental issue. We want nothing but the best for our loved one, but we can end up spreading ourselves too thin. We give everything we have to the point that we are harming ourselves. It is important that when we are caring for others that we take the time to also care for ourselves. If we don't take care of ourselves we can't care for others. In this interview I talk to Ron Ball as he shares his personal story of what it is like providing long term care for a loved one and what he learned about taking care of himself during that time.

There is a lot of talk about the idea of what we manifest in our lives, both positive and negative. I personally think that we pay too much attention to manifesting and attracting and give nowhere near enough credit to personal choice and response. In this conversation with my friend Jondi Whitis we talk about what we can control, what we create, and what we are responsible for. This is just one point of view and I would love to hear your thoughts on the topic.

Our romantic relationships take up a great deal of our time and energy. They can bring us great joy and great frustration (and sometimes both at the same time). Even though each relationship is a new and different experience we can find ourselves falling into the same patterns. Some repeat themselves from relationship to relationship, whilst others keep repeating themselves inside the same relationship. In this interview with Alina Frank we talk about how we can identify these patterns and how they were created. We also spend time looking at how we can use tapping/EFT to clear the negative patterns in our current relationships and those of repeating the same type of negative relationship experiences.

When I am setting up interviews for the podcast I normally ask my guest, "What is the thing that really gets your juices flowing? It doesn't have to be what you are known for. I want to know what is exciting you right now!" Once we have agreed on a topic the guest sends me a few bullet points to help me to form questions. When I was having this back and forth with Rue Hass she said, "This is something I am really excited about and it is so new to me that I can't even send you an outline." I love getting to be a part of new things! In this interview Rue shares a new technique that she is working with which uses metaphors and having clients draw pictures. It is absolutely brilliant. The technique is simple and elegant and as she was describing it I could see immediately how this could fit into my practice. I know you are going to love this.

A manifesto is nothing more than a statement of beliefs. This is what I believe about the healing process. This is not about tapping the tool, but what happens when we heal and transform. This is how I think when I am working with clients

The history of business is a history about how companies and organizations can be more efficient. Much of this work is about how companies and organizations can create an environment where they can get their employees to be more productive. For most of history this has been about automating processes, educating employees, and learning how to empower employees to make better choice. Today, forward thinking companies like Google and Zappos are starting to look beyond people as cogs in the machine that fill specific tasks, but starting to see them as whole people. When companies feed and support the whole person they are finding their employees are happier, healthier, and more productive. Regardless if you work for someone else, if you employ people, or don't work in a traditional job the lessons about emotional intelligence that these companies are learning can be applied directly to your daily life. In this interview I talk to Paul Zeilzer about what he has learned by visiting companies like Google and Zappos

Many of the practitioners I know are very spiritual people, but for one reason or another they are not connected to a particular denomination or faith tradition. My friend Jake Khym is a different in that regard. He explicitly does Christian counseling. In this conversation we talk about how and why he transitioned from traditional counseling to Christian counseling and how his work now looks different. Also, we spend a great deal of time talking about what it means to provide instruction and teaching in a discipleship relationship vs. what a therapist would normally do. Even if you are not Christian you are going to find this to be a fascinating conversation. Jake is one of the brights and most articulate people I know. His insights in to how people transform and what people are longing for are insightful and will help you with your healing journey regardless how you approach spiritually, faith, or religion.

Let's be honest: Tapping/EFT looks weird when you do it, sounds weird when you explain it, and really is just plain weird. At least once a week as I explaining the work I do and how much I love tapping someone will start to look at me like I have three heads and slowly start creeping away. In any endeavor that we do it is important to have a community of support around us. In these communities we have the opportunity to learn from each other, support each other, and (most importantly) laugh with each other. In the Baltimore area (which is where I live) Steve Carter has done an amazing job in creating just this type of community. The community he has created is from everyone from full time practitioners to people who are just interested in finding way the live health and happier lives. It started very small and over the last few years has not only grown in numbers, but it has also in the quality of support the community provides. For me the only sadness is they normally meet on weekends and I travel 40 weekend

From my point of view the opposite of love is not hate, but instead fear. Fear is a very powerful force. It is very primal and is going to over ride most other emotions an thoughts. In this interview I talk with Colleen Flanagan about the many different faces of fear and how it can be at the root of many other issues. We spend a great deal of time talking about 5 distinct types of fear that can be used as lens to understand many of our deeper issues.

Stress is one of the biggest issues of modern life but I think that it is talked about so much that sometimes we tune it out. We need to keep our eye on how stress affects us day-to-day. Tapping for stress is easy to do and is much like brushing your teeth, you need do a little bit daily to make lasting change. In this interview I talk to Louise Woods about the impact of stress on the body and some simple things that you can do right now to improve your mood and your health.

As more time passes few and few people are aware of the roots of tapping as we know it. Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) as presented by Gary Craig build upon the foundations of Thought Field Therapy (TFT). In this interview I chat with Joanne Callahan the co-developer of Thought Field Therapy with her husband Roger Callahan. Joanne has many great insights into not only how Thought Field Therapy came to be created and how we can add the tools and techniques of TFT to our daily tapping. In this conversation we cover the differences between FTF and EFT. We also talk about what psychological reversal is, how toxins affect the healing process, and how we can do something about both right away. We also spend time talking about one of Joanne's passions tapping for trauma (both big and small).

Doing this interview was particularly special to me. My guest Brad Yates was the person who first introduced me to Tapping/EFT. In this spirited conversation we talk about the importance of self-love, the obstacles to loving ourself, and what we can do with tapping to improve our view of ourselves. I know we talk a lot about self love and self acceptance when it comes to tapping. It is right there in the set up phrase, "I love and accept myself." Even with that being the case it is still one of the issues for my clients (and to be honest for myself) that we struggle with most and it is the topic we are least likely to tap for. I firmly believe all healing is rooted in self love and self acceptance. The audio on this podcast is a little rough. I have included a full transcript below because I didn't want you to miss the goodness.

In this podcast my friend Jondi Whitis discuss a bunch of topics around tapping and healing. In the conversation we cover: Being able to be honest about where we really are and why that is paramount to healing. Using where we are to build on knowing where would like to be. How to stay in the moment (which leads to healthier choices). Noticing what is happening emotionally. Is tapping similar to hypnotic induction? Why we resist healing and how can we deal with it. Why tapping doesn't work when I tap on my own. How I can move forward and still feel like I am going backwards. What to do when I don't know what I want. What to do when a client doesn't know how to talk about their emotions. How do I continue to grow my understanding that I am enough.

We all know the EFT mantra, "Try it on everything!" Deborah Miller took this completely to heart. Today she visits a cancer ward five days a week where she has the opportunity to work with children, parents, and even the hospital staff. In this interview she talks about her experience, what she has learned, and her hopes for the future. Even if you don't know someone with cancer and you don't think you will ever work in a hospital setting I encourage you to listen to this interview. There are many specific lessons you can apply to your own daily tapping practice and also in introducing tapping to others.

One of the biggest blocks for beginning tappers is using the setup phrase, "Even though...I love and accept myself." Sometimes we just don't believe it. Sometimes it is painful to think of how we don't love and accept ourselves, and because of this we don't spend time tapping. In this interview I chat with Steve Wells about the idea of self acceptance. During our conversation I quickly came to realize that Steve and I see acceptance and resistance in the same way. We talk about Steve's own (continuing) journey to self acceptance, how he made significant progress using a simple 30-day process, and how moving towards self acceptance heals many other issues in our lives.

"According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy." Jerry Seinfeld Fear of public speaking can affect not only large moments when we speak in front of a group of people, but also in the small moments like asking for help at a store. This is how I originally found my way to tapping. I could speak in front of 8,000 people but couldn't ask for help in a store. In this interview I talk with Janet Hilts about how we can use Tapping/EFT for many different aspects of public speaking. We explore how sometimes the issue isn't the speaking itself but aspects around it, and discuss a simple approach that you can use to start tapping for your public speaking fears right away.

In Pod #11: Tapping for Romantic Relationships I talked with Gina Parris about how we can tap to improve our romantic relationships. In this interview we take the next step and talk about how we can use tapping to improve our sexual relationship to reflect the emotional intimacy we share with our partners. It can put a real strain on a relationship when we don't feel truly connected to our partner and often we don't know how to talk about it, or even where to start. In this interview Gina shares practical tips for using tapping to rekindle the passion and fire in relationships.

Back in the fall I asked 10 practitioners that I admire and respect to answer 5 questions about the healing process, the healing journey, and their work with clients. The questions I asked them were: What lessons have you learned about healing from a client? What is something you have changed your mind about when it comes to healing, working with clients, or your own transformation process? If you were to start your own healing journey over again what would you do differently? What is one thing you wish your clients believed about themselves? What is one thing you wish your clients believed about healing process? You can check out their answers in the Round Up Archive Let me know your answers in the comment section below.