Drunk Ex-pastors

Episode #149 of Drunk Ex-Pastors begins with a voicemail from a guy from the nicest nation on Earth, after which we briefly revisit the topic of hell (Jason thinks the idea that it is needed in order to keep people in line is mostly crap). We discuss the push-back over Christian thoughts on Artificial Intelligence, drawing from our vast knowledge of sci-fi films to set the record straight. We take a call about the healthcare debate, and then hear from a real-life Trump supporter who, as a white male (gasp!), thinks people need to stop being so sensitive and offended all the time. We hear from more listeners who bring up whether marriage is worth fighting for, whether sharing our personal beliefs is important, and why only our culture chooses the right animals to eat. Christian is biebered by the housing market, while Jason’s bieber focuses on ice. Also, 4 year-olds with mustaches? Shudder.

Episode #148 of Drunk Ex-Pastors begins with the usual banter, this time involving Christian coming out of the closet, whether we get drunk enough on the show, and a story from Jason about this old Indian with the most random bigotry ever. We take a couple calls that help us lay to rest the “girls” vs. “women” debate, after which we revisit the issue of hell (it’s been a while), and specifically whether our notion of justice demands some sort of system of retribution and rewards when all is said and done. We address the House’s recent “healthcare” bill and what supporting it says about a person (hint: they’re either evil or just dumb). Lastly, our “Dick Move, God” segment highlights the demise of a Father/Son business that initially showed such promise. Christian is biebered by some city that ancient Hebrews decimated, while Jason’s bieber has to do with having to finish the job that his server started. Also, the frickin Irish, am I right? 

We begin episode #147 of Drunk Ex-Pastors with a call from a slightly inebriated listener whom Christian inadvertently caused to have a very uncomfortable conversation with his grandmother. We correct the inventor of the gif on how to pronounce gif, and then hear from resident millennial snowflake “Dallas,” who displays sufficient contrition over misdefining butt-rock that we hereby absolve him. We then revisit (hopefully for the last time) the issue of referring to chicks as “girls” — in a nutshell, Jason responds to those who he feels criticized him too harshly, insisting that no, he doesn’t “hate women.” Then in a display of delicious irony, Christian spends the rest of the episode exhibiting the very hate that Jason is accused of. We spend a few moments congratulating ourselves on our grammar, and discuss Ann Coulter’s aborted speech at Berkeley. Christian is biebered by ingredients, while Jason’s bieber has to do with dieting. Also, “colon-rock” is now a thing. Tell your friends.

We begin our latest episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors by noting a drastic change in Jason’s daughter and the discovery of Christian’s dead dog. We then take a call from an entitled millennial snowflake who presumes to correct us about the nature of butt-rock. We take the opportunity to school this whippersnapper and, by extension, his entire ill-informed Johnny-come-lately generation. This leads us into an unplanned discussion about the issue of nostalgia and whether it is a healthy indulgence or not. We take a call from a girl who challenges us, again, about whether it’s OK to call girls “girls” when in reality they’re full-grown girls. This leads us naturally into a breakdown of the North Korea situation, as well as a conversation about whether people on the Right are more tribal than those on the Left (they are). Finally, Christian is biebered by having gas. I mean, having to get gas. Also, is that Freedom Rock? Well turn it up, man!

This episode of DXP is fraught with attacks: against how we pronounce stuff, what we listen to, what we write, etc. But as with most prophets and sages, we understand that we are bound to be under-appreciated by our own unworthy generation, yet we soldier on. We take calls about mixing booze with brain injuries, about the nature of fundamentalism as it relates to our über-chaste vice president, and then we discuss the recent woes of everyone’s favorite airline. We discuss the evangelical insistence that American Christians are being persecuted, after which we hear from a listener who is ready to put down Jason’s book after only reading one chapter. Lastly, we discuss whether believing in hell keeps people from thinking outside the box. Our “Dick Move, God” segment teaches us that theft in the name of the Lord is just fine; Christian is biebered by thanksgiving even though it’s Easter, and Jason’s bieber has to do with thinking more people care about him than actually do. Also, Buttrock. It’s totally a thing.

We begin episode #144 of Drunk Ex-Pastors by settling a long-brewing tech-related controversy (you’re welcome), after which we demonstrate just how secure we are by recommending our audience check out another podcast besides this one. We talk a bit about our concert experience the night before, which account takes a rather overt Shakespearian turn. We take callers’ questions about lying to our significant other, about height discrepancies in relationships, and about helping those who suffer. After our break we discuss Vice President Pence’s personal policy regarding sexual predators (read: women), and disagree somewhat on how we feel about it. Christian shares his Feeding Friendsy, which has to do with religious bubble-dwellers. Jason’s bieber focuses on ageism, while Christian is biebered by the five-oh. Also, it’s weird how people who live in non-white countries are surrounded by minorities all the time, but seem totally fine with it.

Episode #143 of DXP begins with a discussion of the pros and cons of online dating. We talk about whether the old stigmas still apply, how to handle a bad first impression, and whether it’s harder for men or for women. We discuss our TV watching habits, after which we take a call from a listener who asks whether there is a grand conspiracy on the part of the secular media to cover up the evidence for God’s existence, and if so, does that mean that atheistic scientists are dishonest and suppressing truths they know deep down are real? We delve into some personal territory involving issues like co-habitation, marriage, and to what degree children should affect our decisions on these matters. Our “Feeding Friendsy” segment involves people who try to be openminded but can’t, and this week’s “Dick Move, God” introduces us to a guy who can’t help but feel he has been cruelly toyed with his whole life. Christian is biebered by climate change advocates and deniers, while Jason’s bieber involves having too many friend

Episode #142 of Drunk Ex-Pastors begins with a listener’s suggestion about a DXP pub meet-up, to which we respond by reminding everyone that in January we will be on a floating pub in the Caribbean Sea (also known as a “cruise ship”) and everyone’s invited. We then turn to spiritual themes, discussing whether prayer works, whether staying evangelical is worth it, and why God constantly tries to make us all atheists by pretending he doesn’t exist. Our Feeding Friendsy segment will almost make you want to start reading your Bible again; Jason is biebered by silence, while Christian’s bieber has to do with people who don’t suck enough. Also, you have a 3-minute limit for voice mails. It’s not that hard.

This episode of DXP begins with a caller ranting about how the earth is supposedly round, after which we announce that the DXP Cruise is actually happening! (Details provided.) We take a voicemail about unity coexisting with diversity, and then revisit our thought experiment about whether, in the face of some apocalyptic worldwide tragedy, the evidence for religion would eventually emerge the way scientific evidence would. We take another call that challenges Jason about whether he is just a deist, after which we get to our biebers: Jason is annoyed by what happens after he sits down, and Christian is biebered by having to be a grower. Also, being a physics teacher at a Christian school sounds awesome.

After beginning episode #140 with the realization that we may soon be receiving a human body part in the mail, we revisit (hopefully for the last time) the fact that there are “roundearthers” out there who actually deny that our planet is flat (people will believe just about anything it seems). We then discuss a listener’s challenge about whether or not both theists and atheists stack the deck against their opponents, after which we weigh in on the so-called “power of prayer” (does it help, and if not are we just doing it wrong?). This segues into the issue of comforting those who suffer, and the good and bad ways of doing that. Our “Dick Move, God” segment introduces us to a man whose daughter *wasn’t* killed in a religious war but who wishes she had been, and Christian’s bieber involves wanting more bodily fluids to be emitted on TV, while Jason’s has to do with the antiquated issue of long-distance charges. Also, they send us a toe we’re supposed to shit ourselves with fear.

We begin this episode of DXP with the admission that it is possible, albeit unlikely, that the earth is flat. We then delve into the issue of taking the Lord’s Name in vain, which that sentence may have done, after which we heal a listener’s marriage by explaining how to pronounce Feb-you-ary. We take a call about Christian’s agnosticism, which leads into a discussion about whether knowing stuff is overrated or not. After our break we embark on a lighthearted romp through the not-thorny-at-all issue of what actually constitutes pedophilia. We anticipate blowback on this. Christian’s “Feeding Friendsy” tackles the issue of whether Bernie Sanders wants The Islamic States of America, and he is biebered by having to sign his name so often. Also, Milo is still a piece of shit.

We’re not gonna lie, our #138th episode of DXP is quite voicemail-heavy (Hey, lay off. We had been fighting. Plus, we love hearing from our peoples). We begin with a brief Trump voicemail and then move on toward ANOTHER nitpicky piece of crap reminder that Jason doesn’t know how to pronounce things. Christian is corrected about his fallacious views about Einstein, while another caller expresses heartfelt and poignant opinions about WTF? Some NBA player named after a Mr. Mister song? We address playing the piano, eating at Subway, and then hear from an honest-to-goodness therapist who weighs in on whether last week’s discussion about vulnerability was correct or not (although she may be hiding behind an attachment disorder due to unresolved daddy issues, we’re not sure). We revisit Milo Yiannopoulos very briefly, after which we launch into our “Feeding Friendsy” and “Dick Move, God” segments (Hitler was not a socialist, and gay rapists and virgin daughters don’t mix). Christian is biebered by small spaces, whi

Episode #137 begins with a listener’s challenge to go an entire show without mentioning D*n*ld Tr*mp, and believe it or not, we succeeded! We then reveal a bit about a new project we will soon embark upon (hint: it’s pretty much the best gift idea, like, EVER). We talk a bit about the nature of our discussions IRL and how they differ from those on the air, as well as about the value of constantly second-guessing ourselves. After our break we delve into mutual examination mode, with Christian diagnosing Jason as having jealousy and anger issues, and Jason diagnosing Christian as disproportionately desiring certainty in relationships. We spend a few minutes talking about Milo Yiannopoulos and whether people like him are even worth engaging, after which we share our biebers (Christian’s is about retirement funds, while Jason’s is about overly-excited audiences). Also, Christian finished a whole book for the first time in years, in a single day! You’ll never guess who the author was….

Episode #136 begins with a caller’s attempt to put Jason in a moral dilemma, which fails because he doesn’t really pay attention to morals all that much. We then get marriage advice from a well-meaning listener and somehow find ourselves on a rabbit trail pertaining to the relationship between music and language. We weigh in on the current refugee crisis and tackle the conspiracy theory about Obama seeking to sabotage Trump (while kitesurfing in the Caribbean, apparently). We then heed the solemn warnings of the Holocaust Museum which basically call Trump Hitler 2.0. Christian’s “Feeding Friendsy” segment focuses on our president’s Twitter account, and meanwhile Jason is biebered by crap music producers, while Christian shares a listener’s bieber about traffic signals. Also, just because Christian won’t gaymarry Jason, if Ryan Gosling were available then all bets may be off…

This episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors begins with a feel-good voicemail, and then we introduce our new venture, the DXP Mediacast (hint, watch the movie About Time. Then watch Chef). We spend some time breaking down the poignant and thoughtful words of our new president at the National Prayer Breakfast, after which we take a caller’s question about whether being religious necessarily includes being an elitist. A listener’s call causes us to wonder if Trump is himself the greatest prophylactic ever invented, and another caller wants to know how to navigate a relationship in which the two partners can’t agree on spiritual matters. We discuss Trump’s “travel ban,” which segues into a larger discussion of whether anything the president does comports with anything resembling Christianity. Lastly, we discuss whether it’s fair for Christian leaders to whine about being persecuted when the government actually singles them out for special financial favors. Jason is biebered by people’s irrational brand loyalty. Also, Chris

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we welcome to the studio philosopher and theologian Peter Rollins, after whose Lucky Charms they always are. We discuss everything from Radical Theology to La La Land, tackling such topics as whether any of us truly knows what we believe, and whether atheism vs. theism is a false dichotomy (and on that note, you’ll be surprised to hear which one of us Pete thinks believes in God the most). Pete’s background in psychoanalysis will surely make everyone who listens feel like they’ve had a therapy session, and his accent will make you wonder if he has in fact met Bono. Also, Pete is biebered by biebers.

In an episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors that is filled with rabbit trails and red herrings, we begin by being read the riot act by some nature lover with an obvious canyon fetish, and then we are gently told by another caller that we may need to up our game or risk starvation and poverty. We take another voicemail urging us to do more movie reviews, which prompts us to divulge another one of our future plans that probably won’t come to fruition (Hashtag, DXPCruise). We follow up a bit on the topic of minimalism, and then take a tear-jerker of a call about how unique our friendship apparently is. We discuss a recent study that suggests that Trump voters are in fact as horrible as we suspected they were, after which we launch into our Feeding Friendsy segment which is both about, and elicits, eyerolls. Jason is biebered by standing in line, while Christian’s bieber has to do with proper chair protocol. Also, I swallowed a bug.

This episode begins with a quick debrief of our “Catholic Lesbian” interview and then segues into a discussion of the Netflix documentary Minimalism, which left Christian wondering whether it was naïve and Jason wondering why more followers of that homeless Jewish carpenter aren’t on board with the idea. We discuss the Golden Globes and La La Land in particular, debating just how depressed the film was intended to make us. We then spend some time breaking down Meryl Streep’s acceptance speech, considering what the next four years will look like with a childish bully in the White House. We then spend some time sifting through the latest reports concerning whether Trump is being blackmailed by Russia and what, if anything, this has to do with prostitutes and urine (turns out, very little). But nothing would surprise us at this point! Also, relevant celevbrity opinions: an oxymoron?

We begin our New Year’s episode of DXP with a look back at 2016 in all its glory and shame, with Christian taking the blame for how bad this last year treated so many people. We then reflect a bit on the death of Carrie Fisher, springboarding to the issue of celebrity deaths in general and whether mourning the passing of people we don’t really know is pathetic or legit. We take a call about whether difficulty and trial produce better quality satire and music, and if so, whether this may be silver lining around the dark cloud of a future Trump presidency. Another caller schools Jason on the topic of evolution (how hard can it be? Fish  Monkey  Man, right?). We then squeeze in one final caller whose question focuses on the simple matter of the meaning of life. Christian is biebered by people’s self-obliviousness on TV, while Jason’s bieber focuses on people looking better than they should. Also, suck it, 2016. Your time is over.

Our Christmas episode begins, appropriately enough, with an uplifting breakdown of the story of Rudolph, a tale about a bunch of proto-Nazis whose demand for hegemony is outweighed only by their cold heartless pragmatism (who knew?). We then reminisce about how rad the ‘80s were, what with the whole Cold War and whatnot. We then take a few calls about religion: Do our bad deeds really make us hell-worthy? Do you have to confess every last sin we commit? And would we prefer God *not* to exist, and if he didn’t, what would we do? Our “Feeding Friendsy” highlights the irony of feminists for Trump, while our “Dick Move, God” segment introduces us to a man who’s both “after God’s own heart” as well as after the king’s hot daughter, and he’s got a sack of wiener-bits to prove it. Christian is biebered by unwanted residue clouding his eyesight, while Jason’s bieber reveals how envious he is of celebrities. Also, the Island of Misfit Toys is a metaphor for Auschwitz. Seriously.