Evolutionary Parenting Podcast

We are almost two years into a global pandemic and many families have struggled to find a new normal. Some people seem to have found a new normal that exceeds life pre-pandemic, but many face ongoing difficulties. Parents are in a unique position because they are not only facing this pandemic from a personal perspective, but also as those trying to navigate their children's social and emotional well-being. How people are faring is a topic of great interest for researchers and joining me today to talk about how these changes are affecting parents is the head of the Lancet's Covid Mental Health and Well-Being Task Force, Dr. Lara Aknin. As a researcher who primarily studies what makes us happy, she's in a unique position to help us better understand what's going on and how we can all feel better. Dr. Lara Aknin: https://www.sfu.ca/psychology/about/people/profiles/laknin.html Lancet's Covid-19 Commission: https://covid19commission.org/ Relevant Articles: https://psyarxiv.com/zw93g/ https://psyarxiv.com/vd

Stress is a hot topic today with many people worrying about the degree of stress they face daily. We know stress in our adult lives is a problem, but I often hear people speak about stress as if it's only an adult problem. Sadly children can face many stressors - some of them quite large - early in life and this can have profound and nuanced impacts on their development, especially how they respond to stress in the future. Joining me today is Dr. Brie Reid, a researcher focusing on the effects of exposure to early life stressors - and the removal of these stressors - and that impacts the development of our stress and other physiological outcomes, including new findings that might bring hope to many. Dr. Brie Reid: https://www.briemreid.com/about Dr. Reid on Twitter: https://twitter.com/briemreid?lang=en Articles of Interest: https://www.pnas.org/content/116/48/23984.short https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/development-and-psychopathology/article/abs/challenges-in-researching-the-immune-pathways-betwee

One of the more terrifying events for any parent is seeing their child born and rushed off to the NICU. Though we might talk about how it's so much better compared to losing our children - and there's no doubt that's the case - the typical experience for families in the NICU isn't one that we would wish on anyone. Some of the best NICUs in terms of medical care are those least equipped to deal with the psychological and bonding needs of new families. Parents can be left with little time with their baby, no room for them to stay, and advice that counters their instincts to care for the newest member of their family. Sharing a blend of her own experience in this regard, the science around neurological and general development for preterm or low birth weight babies, and an understanding of the needs of families today, Dr. Greer Kirshenbaum joins me to help families who have either already experienced this event and need help processing, are in the midst of this experience, or don't know if it's something they

Too often we look at parenting practices and our judgment of them in absolute terms. I know I myself have been guilty of this. Sometimes it's warranted, but sometimes the judgments and the repercussions become a way that we disenfranchise and marginalize already marginalized groups in our society. When we think about the experiences of families facing involvement from government systems - many of which are founded on principles that are racist in nature - we can start to understand how the systems mean to support children may end up doing the opposite. This week I am joined by Dr. Paul Adjei, a scholar focusing on social justice, racism, critical race theory, and more, as we discuss the parenting experiences of marginalized families in Canada - and by extension other Western nations - today. This is a conversation that may be uncomfortable for some and I can say it certainly led me to think about things I had held as absolute truths in ways I hadn't before. If nothing else, it should challenge us to thi

Welcome back to Week 2 with Dr. James McKenna as we continue our conversation into SIDS, colic, breathing, and how our closeness to our babies can protect them. Please see below for the summary from Part 1: I want to mention some things that parents of young babies have to think about. They often think about: * Where their baby sleeps * Why their baby cries (or cries so much) * Worry about SIDS * How much their baby sleeps * Their baby's brain development * How to feed their baby (and how to get support for it) * Wondering when our babies will speak Of course there is so much more, but I mention these in particular because they may all be related to something we definitely don't think about: How our babies breathe. If you're confused, don't worry because this week is the first of two episodes covering these topics - and more - with the incredible Dr. James McKenna. Over two weeks, James shares so much wisdom about our babies, parenting, and this both older and newer line of research he's looking at link

I want to mention some things that parents of young babies have to think about. They often think about: * Where their baby sleeps * Why their baby cries (or cries so much) * Worry about SIDS * How much their baby sleeps * Their baby's brain development * How to feed their baby (and how to get support for it) * Wondering when our babies will speak Of course there is so much more, but I mention these in particular because they may all be related to something we definitely don't think about: How our babies breathe. If you're confused, don't worry because this week is the first of two episodes covering these topics - and more - with the incredible Dr. James McKenna. Over two weeks, James shares so much wisdom about our babies, parenting, and this both older and newer line of research he's looking at linking so many of these parenting issues to that most basic physiological function of breathing. Dr. James McKenna: https://cosleeping.nd.edu/mckenna-biography/ The Mother-Infant Sleep Laboratory: https://cosl

We all want our kids to be able to regulate themselves, don't we? It feels like one of the main goals of parenting is how we are able to help get our kids to the stage where they can handle big emotions, frustrations, and the minor struggles on their own. Like most things that are developmental in nature, parents can play a key role in how this happens. This week we explore the issue of how parents can help their child's emotion regulation development with renowned researcher Dr. Lisa Gatzke-Kopp. From parenting in infancy to the synchrony between parent and child, the insights she has gleaned from years of research are not to be missed. Dr. Lisa Gatzke-Kopp: https://hhd.psu.edu/contact/lisa-gatzke-kopp The Penn State Prevention Science Research Center: https://www.prevention.psu.edu/ The Family Life Project: https://flp.fpg.unc.edu/ Relevant Articles: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/imhj.21913 https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/dev.21905 https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2021

Babywearing is still somewhat fringe in our society, despite being exactly how babies have been kept close to parents for most of human history. I mean, it's not like we had strollers back in the stone age. When people utilize babywearing today, most do so for convenience. After all, if you've tried navigating strollers on public transit, you know the nightmare. But is there more to it? Attachment parenting advocates keeping babies close to build attachment and foster bonds, but does it really do that? This week I had a chance to talk to the one researcher who is bringing babywearing back to the lab to help us answer these very questions. Dr. Lela Rankin Williams of Arizona State University is the first researcher in decades to look at how babywearing may influence the relationship between baby and caregiver. If you've thought it's just a fad, I hope Dr. Williams can help change your mind. Dr. Lela Rankin Williams: https://cals.arizona.edu/fcs/faculty/affiliate/lela_williams Relevant Articles: http

When you think back to your birth, do you recall it fondly? The way they say you're supposed to feel about this momentous moment? Or do you try to block it out? Cry about it? Feel like it was an event you don't even want to remember? For too many families, birth isn't a peaceful event or even a happy one, but something that brings longer lasting traumas for all. Though many tend to think that if baby is healthy, there's no reason for this, unfortunately a healthy baby does not mean there was no trauma. This week I am honoured to have spoken with Dr. Kathy Kendall-Tackett, the leader in research on birth trauma about how it happens, what it can look like, the various effects of it afterwards on the family, but also what others can do to help heal and how we can reduce the frequency of such trauma going forward. It doesn't matter who you are or your own experience, this is an issue that is vital for all of us to understand and work to change. Dr. Kathy Kendall-Tackett: https://www.kathleenkendall-tac

When we get pregnant and are expecting our first child, most people don't see this as a time to worry that their mental health is going to go downhill. We're supposed to be happy or even thrilled about this new stage in our lives. But for many families, pregnancy is the beginning of what can be some serious mental health struggles. Perinatal depression, anxiety, and more are all common occurrences, yet ones we don't really talk about in our society. We don't warn families and many will struggle without support or even awareness of what is going on. This week I spoke to clinical psychologist and perinatal mental health specialist Dr. Annie Rohr about her own journey through perinatal mental health struggles and this issue more broadly. Whether you have struggled or not, all of us need to be aware of what to look for and how to help. Show notes: Dr. Annie Rohr: https://drannierohr.com/ Post Partum International: https://www.postpartum.net/ Mom Genes Research Project: https://www.momgenesfightppd.org/ D

If you've listened here before you will know that the research doesn't support the idea that extinction sleep training methods, like crying it out or controlled crying, actually improve our infant's sleep (or children's for that matter). Despite parents reporting improvements, when we look at objective measures of sleep, the sleep of children pre- and post-sleep training is actually no different. Many of us see this as a bit damning for sleep training, but what cannot be denied is that sleep training may improve parent sleep and in cultures where sleep is hard to come by and expectations for parents are through the roof, this is not something to be overlooked. This week, I was able to chat with Dr. Levita D'Souza about this very tension - how do we balance our infant's needs for proximity and support as well as their biologically normal sleep rhythms with a parent's need for more sleep in an unsupportive culture. We both know that only if we can start to address this issue will we be able to move away fro

When we think about education, most of us think about our experience with what we might call modern-traditional schooling: classes by grade, a teacher at the front, testing, memorization, getting to know a new teacher each year, and maybe some more good like good friendships or more bad, like bullying. But what if school doesn't have to look like this? What alternative paradigms are out there? This week I'm joined by former Montessori Principal and advocate for public Montessori at a national level John Freeman to discuss what the different features of Montessori are and how they can help children thrive. My hope is that after listening to our conversation, families who feel that education could be better for their kids have one more option that they might feel comfortable exploring. The National Center for Montessori in the Public Sector: https://www.public-montessori.org/about-us/ Elm City Montessori School: https://elmcitymontessori.org/about-us/ Hartford Courant article: https://www.courant.com/new

"It's just the way it is!" "Progress is always good" These are the sentiments that many people feel about the way our society and culture is structured. Because it's how we've grown up and what we've experienced, we believe this is the way it is. We view change as progress and think that anything different must be less than. But what if this isn't the type of society or life that enabled us humans to thrive? We evolved to this point, but is this really the best we can hope for? Welcome to the concept of the Evolved Nest - the concept that how we lived for the majority of human history has been what enabled our success and moving back to the key features of that history can help us thrive once again. This week I had the pleasure of talking with Dr. Darcia Narveaz, the creator of this concept and the associated nonprofit organization to discuss what this involves and how we can all thrive. Isn't it time we get to the stage where we all feel whole again? Dr. Darcia Narvaez: https://psychology.nd.edu/facu

When you thought about nursing, did you think about how long it would go? Did you think, "I will absolutely be done by one because that's old enough"? Then find yourself with a 2-year-old attached to the boob and worry that they're too old? Or perhaps you were okay with that from the start, but still face comments, questions, and accusations from others about this? Welcome to nursing beyond infancy - something most of the world does, but which those of us in WEIRD - Western, Educated, Industrial, Rich, and Democratic - countries seem to have some odd ideas about. This week I am joined by Meg Nagle, IBCLC and founder of The Milk Meg, as we debunk some of these myths that you may have been told so that you can, in the words of Meg, keep on boobin' with less stress and worry. The Milk Meg: https://themilkmeg.com/ All Tied Up*: https://amzn.to/3qUHcEs Boobin' All Day Boobin' All Night*: https://amzn.to/3qT7Nln Some articles on nursing older children: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2720507/ htt

From the moment a family is expecting their first child, decisions are made about how that relationship is going to work, decisions that don't always match reality. The addition of a new person to the family - and a rather helpless one at that - changes everything. Here we have a baby who needs and expects certain things. Food. Warmth. Care. We also have parents who often live in cultures that tell them what to expect from their baby. And as I talked about last week with Dr. Helen Ball, often the messages parents get are incongruent with their realities. This week the discussion continues with Dr. Cecilia Tomori who has spent a career doing in-depth, ethnographic work on how families navigate and negotiate the tensions that affect parenting decisions, particularly from a moral framework of how we make the decisions we do. From colonialism to convenience, you may be surprised at all the ways parenting decisions are influenced. Dr. Cecilia Tomori: https://nursing.jhu.edu/faculty_research/faculty/facult

"You must breastfeed!" says the medical professional. "Don't you dare sleep with your baby!" says the same medical professional. The tension between how we feed our babies and how we sleep with them is a real problem for many new families. As primates, we are expected to stay close to our young, and that includes nighttime, and this has profound implications for our feeding journey. As we discussed last week, breast or chestfeeding grief is real and many families struggle with it, but some of this comes from advice that may be well-intentioned but harms that feeding relationship. This week I got to talk to the expert herself - Dr. Helen Ball - researcher of the effects of sleep location on feeding and vice versa about this very issue. She also happens to be one of my favourite people to talk so this episode was an absolute joy for me. If you think that how you sleep doesn't affect how you feed your baby or how you feed your baby doesn't affect how you sleep, you're likely in for a bit of a surprise.

Although not every parent chooses to, many report wanting to breastfeed or chestfeed their child. Our Western society likes to promote this with slogans and ideas that "breast is best", but most of that isn't backed up with the type of support that parents need to make this a reality. From inadequate leave to advice that counters the promotion of breastfeeding to a lack of instrumental and social support for new parents, breast and chestfeeding are an uphill battle, to say the least. Unfortunately this means many parents fail to reach their own goals and this can lead to intense grief about this. Too often, they are told it doesn't matter or just to suck it up, neither of which is supportive or helpful for parents experiencing this grief. This week I was privileged to talk to Dr. Amy Brown about this issue, one she has researched and written on for her book, "Why breastfeeding grief and trauma matter". Whether you were successful in your breast or chestfeeding goals or not, or even if that just wasn't y

When we first become parents there are tons of books and advice for us to follow in the baby years and even the toddler years. As our kids age, however, it seems that all the parenting experts start to fade away. They don't dare touch the older children until perhaps the teenage years. Yet our tweens - that delicate age around 8 to 13 - is crucial to how we will face the teenage years with our children. The challenges that can come with this age can set the stage for how we will approach potentially even more tumultuous times in adolescence, but many parents feel lost at sea as they face these years. This week I had the joy of talking to Sarah Ockwell-Smith who many of you will know for her work in infancy and toddlerhood, but who has filled the much-needed gap for us parents of tweens with her new book Between. From connection with our tweens to anxiety to social activism, we delved into some of the key areas that parents need to be aware of when it comes to parenting tweens. And as always, it comes w

Welcome back to part two of my talk with Brian Earp. If you haven't listened yet to last week's episode, I strongly suggest you do because some of what we talk about this week directly follows that conversation. Moving on from the discussion of health risks versus benefits of male infant circumcision, this week we turn towards the social elephant in the room, namely the gendered debate on circumcision as well as more emotional issues such as the defensiveness of parents and the struggles for some men to feel heard on the issue. I hope this conversation may also provide a means for families or individuals struggling to find a way to open up and feel heard. It's up to all of us to listen when people share their story. Brian Earp: https://philosophy.yale.edu/people/brian-earp Brian Earp's YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCR4umqUbmaDirAig2zD-zBw Resources: Your Whole Baby: https://www.yourwholebaby.org/ Doctors Opposing Circumcision: https://www.doctorsopposingcircumcision.org/ The Intact

In North America - the United States in particular - males are regularly circumcised at birth. Over the years, various arguments have been made leading up to a shift in the American Academy of Pediatrics suggesting that the benefits of male infant circumcision outweigh the risks. In this episode - the first of two - I had the chance to talk to Brian Earp, an outspoken critic of the arguments often made in favour of non-therapeutic male infant circumcision. He approaches this topic with logic and science and we start today by looking at these arguments regarding benefits versus risks and how this relates to a child's right to bodily autonomy. I know this is a topic that can be hard for some people, but it's an important one that we need to discuss. Brian Earp: https://philosophy.yale.edu/people/brian-earp Relevant Articles: https://jme.bmj.com/content/39/7/418.short https://wchh.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/tre.531 https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Brian-Earp-2/publication/316527603_Cultur