Doing The Stuff

Torrent. Inundation. Drinking from a firehouse… It’s been a big year. Rather than flicking quickly to the next year we thought we’d have a crack at some reflection. But how? 2016 was huge. How do you pick through it, gleaning the good stuff, the lessons, the keepers, noticing where God’s at work and not let the headlines dissipate the important. Mark and Andy DIY a 2016 sieve, a set of questions to help you digest the year that was. They stick to them, sort of. Join us for the last huzzah this calendar year. Play along at home. We look forward to seeing you on the other side!

‘Tis the season to be jolly… and stressed, right? There’s nothing like deadline pressure to focus the mind and bring about lots of stress-inducing situations. This week Mark and Andy help alleviate your worries with some well-timed catharsis. Introducing Mark and Andy’s Handy Guide to the 12 Pains of Christmas! Sit back, relax and enjoy knowing it’s not just you. We’re all facing very similar dilemmas, and sometimes you just need a bit of a laugh before carrying on.

Let’s get down to business - it’s time for the bible episode! This is a story about our bible reading habits, or lack thereof. But Mark and Andy aren’t out to name and shame - this isn’t the guilt trip episode. The question is whether we’ve become just a little too casual. If you’ve been a Christian for a while, there’s a good chance you’re pretty familiar with many of the bible’s big stories. Familiarity can breed contempt, right? Well, that doesn’t change the fact that we need the bible at a deep soul level. So how do we wrestle with the internal dilemma - you’d like to read more, but find it tough. Maybe you’re out of practice? Mark & Andy offer a few handy tips on what to do next and make bible reading a life-giving, sustainable part of your day.

The world’s full of angst, worry and confirmation bias. People are blaming Facebook, Google and the media. It’s all their fault, right? What if reality is a little more nuanced? Mark and Andy are fascinated by the idea that we all live in cultural bubbles. We view life through different lenses and it’s colouring the world more than we realise. It’s a bit like that old saying - ideology is like bad breath, it takes someone else to notice. And just like bad breath, entrenched ideologies can start to stink after a while. Our thought life affects relationships, mental health, physical health and our ability to imagine a different future. So, what’s next? Listen to the show for a few clues. Hint: actually listening to a different point of view is a great idea.

How judgemental are you? One of life’s big dilemmas is we’re hard-wired to make judgement calls. First impressions count - we make instant judgements based on a first glance, what people say, or what they believe. The trouble comes when we begin obsessing over long-held beliefs, refusing to concede there’s another valid perspective or opinion. Ironically, our freedom to hold opinions can become a mental prison that locks us up in unforgiveness and negative emotions that have lasting consequences. Mark and Andy wrestle with their emotions, judgements, and even get a bit clever. Andy’s dissection of the Wesleyan Quadrilateral offers hope. How do your judgements line up with experience, scripture, tradition, and reason? Are you ready to challenge your thinking?

They say church appeals to women more than men. Is that right? And if so, how do we respond? This week Mark and Andy rant about an enduring, and if we’re honest, pretty controversial topic. It raises lots of good questions. Like, does the church appeal equally to men and women? What would it mean if the church worked harder to appeal to men? Would we see a more “aggressive” church that talks about beer, footy and V8s? What about solutions - do men need to change? Or does the church need to change? And here’s a kicker, what if they’re the wrong questions? What would Jesus do?

Faith, work, relationships, big decisions - are we doing this or not? Making decisions can hard. There are some significant life questions that we just don’t know the answer to - we can see both sides, and the decision just doesn’t come easy. This week, Mark and Andy talk in or out, decision making, deadlines, and the difficulty of talking with others about our conundrums. Whilst Andy doesn’t know whether we should do this topic at all, he does know talking a walk in the bush gives him the space to decide. Sometimes fence sitting, and self reliance is overrated. Listen in for Mark and Andy’s struggle and insights on making decisions, ceasing anxieties, and taking God into the dilemma.

They say there’s no such thing as a dumb question. Are you sure? Mark and Andy talk this week about the engaging with big questions, creating a question-asking culture and why you should always take a mint when someone offers. Does fear hold us back from asking questions - in the fear of seeming silly - and answering questions - in case we don't like them? Mark notes that Jesus always led with questions, and Andy shares how he got through his high school maths class. Is the quality of your life, determined by the quality of your questions?

We’re in a hurry. Everyone’s busy, and busy all the time. There are big decisions to be made, worries in the back of your head, and no end of the things to do. We’re stressed. When do we get off this horse? Stress is hurry sickness. Or at least, it might be a good way to think about, says Mark. Meanwhile, Andy dabbles in some beginner neuroscience, limbic systems and frontal cortex whatnot. So how do we rid ourselves of stress, and get some space? Naming what you’re feeling, speaking it, writing it down - praying, singing! Allows us to stop simply ‘reacting’ and actually make a good decision on how to deal with it. It might not be for the faint hearted! But it’s really, kinda necessary.

“What changes when you get married? #everything.” After the warm fuzzies of the ‘being a dad’ episode, wanted to follow up by talking all things marriage. Mark shares about the start of the relationship with his wife-to-be, leaving messages on paddle-pop sticks. Also how they deal with challenges, the importance of always growing, being in community and asking for help when it’s needed. How do you keep the flame alive? “Keep talking, all the time. There’s just no shortcut for communication.” And learn their love language! Find out what’s important for you as a couple, and make it happen. Listen in for more.

Are we seeking God? Or are we just using God as another way to lifehack our problems? Lifehack is defined in the urban dictionary as: A tool or technique that makes some aspect of one's life easier or more efficient. We “hack” everything now. Efficiency is the new god of a highly competitive marketplace. It is all too easy to see Christianity as another option on the shelf. But is that actually Christianity? We all want to do something good, we all want get in touch with the deeper realities of life, we all want significance - isn’t God just another of a plethora of streams to drink from? No. It’s about a highly inefficient, indulgent, all encompassing relationship with a God who decided he’d be best known through sending his Son as a Palestinian Jew... Jesus says if you love your life you will lose it. Lose your life for him and you will find it.

We’re all looking for something. We all want things. And when we’ve been looking and wanting for a while, we get it. C.S. Lewis wrote that ‘all find what they truly seek’. Let’s say a career is your ultimate goal... you will experience the eventual emptiness of it. So how do you work out what you’re seeking? Look at what you’re reaping! When the fundamental thing you’re seeking is challenged, will you fight back, or flee from it? Can you walk into the space God created for us? A space of grace, to be moulded and shaped and to be made more like him.

What do you think of, when you think of peace? Maybe it’s a time without war. Maybe it’s getting away from work and seemingly endless things to do. Maybe it’s a comfy hammock next to a white beach... Mark and Andy want to challenge this notion that peace is somewhere you’re not right now, that you need to get rid of things or ‘empty yourself’ to get to it. Peace is a doing word! So how do we do the peace stuff? Consider shalom. It’s a hebrew word for peace, but it also means ‘everything flourishing and right’, it means abundance and fullness of good things. Let’s allow God, who holds the world together in peace to work in our lives, give us perspective and restoration.

Ever listened in on yourself praying? MO is modus operandi - a particular way of doing something. Here, it’s the framework you use to think about God. How you address God might be a good way to start thinking about what your MO is. But the problem is, getting stuck with one MO with God - especially if it's not based on who God really is - puts a big limit on your relationship. We’re putting him in a box. We can get stuck feeling we need to please God - forgetting that the call is instead to put our trust in him. God’s not just our ticket to heaven, he’s not just a loving father, and not just our saviour either. Tune in to Mark and Andy’s chat, as they discover just how compelling it is to be ever learning about God’s character.

Being a Dad is awesome. But the pressures of being a good parent can be an area of paranoia, especially for men. Being a parent is hard. Your kids do things to make you angry, we do things to let them down - are we doing a good job at this Dad gig? Is it even possible? What does a good Dad look like? The question was put to Andy’s kids - and the results are in! Mark and Andy have some thoughts too - will your kids really ‘thank you later’ if you’re working hard for the money but not for a relationship with them? It’s time to face the fact that there’s no substitute for time with your kids. And no, FaceTime doesn’t count, we don’t care how big your phone screen is. Don’t forget time with your partner, time with God and taking time for yourself. Tune in for this and more, and let’s do the Dad stuff well.

If our lives are stories we’re living in, what are the narratives running through yours, and how well does it really work? Is the narrative of your life... The career story - working your way up a corporate ladder or studying hard to get towards that elusive role. Or perhaps it’s the family story, sowing your energy into security and opportunity for your kids. How about today’s crowd favourite - experiences! Where will you travel to next? How will you keep moving through that bucket list? Even the religious story is ultimately similar, doing good and doing ‘right’, in the hope of later payoff. At the end of the day, these stories are all broken - they do not satisfy - and the evidence of which is all too apparent. Aware that it could sound like a Sunday school lesson - is the Jesus story actually what we all need? Mark and Andy chat about a better narrative to live out, and it turns out we might not be the protagonist after all.

There is a porn epidemic in our society. More to the point, there’s a porn epidemic in the church. It’s dangerously warping our attitudes, breaking marriages, and ultimately destroying lives. Few talk about it, so let’s break this down: Porn, like all other addictions is a substitute for something real. We need intimacy and connection - our hearts are screaming at us! But instead we feed them junk. Fact is, Jesus is the only one that can really offer what our hearts long for. The problem? Porn is a click away. Jesus sometimes feels a lot less accessible. We need to get serious about this, practically and spiritually. Be vehement in your opposition; get your filters sorted, talk to someone you trust, give yourself grace, and tell God you want and need Him.

Duty, religious activity, and bad habits can kill your spark. That passion, drive, focus and energy in life you once had as a kid, the thrill of learning something new is gone. Instead, we’re stuck in routines, and we don’t know why we’re doing what we’re doing. It’s a big problem in the way we do church and work, but can appear in any area of our lives. It happens to everyone, and our Doing the Stuff duo are on the case to work out why. Mark talks about washing the dishes. Andy talks in an irish accent, because, why not. Perspective. Maybe the problem is that our field of view is shrunk to the size of the individual tasks. We’re so quick to take the meaning out of moments - we need to put the significance back in! Find the bigger picture/story, no it’s not a waste of time. Hope is real. We are headed somewhere. For God hasn’t given us a spirit of timidity. Let’s get the spark back.

You’ve heard this mantra. “Break free from your constraints, let it go, be whatever you want to be, your only limits are those you set yourself!” Well, it’s time for honesty, folks. Let’s face it, this just isn’t completely true. We’ve all got limits, and they shape us. The number of hours in a day, sickness, and even our genetics are limitations. Just look at Andy. He’ll never make it to the NBA, no matter how often he practices. So what’s up with the lie of limitlessness? It ruins expectations, makes us frustrated, super competitive and occasionally we taste failure. Sound all a bit too sad? Fear not. Mark and Andy discuss the upside of picturing a life of limits. Can we be okay with that? It’s a counter-intuitive conversation but accepting our limits can bring on times of growth and unexpected blessings. Check out this show to discover the delight of knowing your limits and understanding a limitless God.

Is it possible there’s only one great story in the world? And is it possible we’re living in that story as illustrated by the Star Wars narrative? The short answer is yes! It’s called the monomyth, and it’s reflected in the different seasons we all experience in life. The good season, the bad season and the times when we’re really confused about where next. Here’s Mark and Andy’s thesis: if you’ve got a better understanding of what season you’re in, and what’s likely to happen next in your own personal Hero’s Journey, you’ll probably make a better decision. Clearly they lean on gratuitous Star Wars references to illustrate the point, and keep themselves amused. And here’s an insight worth listening for: seasons are good because they help us become seasoned! Make sense? Seasoned food is complex and tasty, just like Yoda’s cooking. To doing the stuff listen, you will. Hmm?!