You Got Jobbed

Rachael Burke started her young career at a lampshade store in Vermont. Later, she won a dance competition on Jimmy Fallon and performed with Jimmy and the Roots. Now she works for him! I actually thought the interview was going to be about lampshades. Original interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/rachael-burke-apprentice-to-the-lampshade-lady

Mike begrudgingly joins me to talk about a few of his friends. One was a movie extra for a brief period of time. The other catalogued porn. Original interviews here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/an-interview-with-matt-haze-former-movie-extra https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/buying-malt-liquor-with-nickels

In the 80s Kim Engler worked at a now-defunct amusement park in Northeast PA. She ran the Scrambler at Angela Park, a great place with a garbage-eating pig trash can and Olympic-sized pool. Original McSweeney’s interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-ran-the-scrambler-an-interview-with-kim-engler

Dexter O’Connell is a referee who has been yelled at in every language of eastern Europe. He drops some Globetrotters knowledge, for example, how many times have the Globetrotters lost? Listen to find out! (Or Google it…) Original McSweeney’s interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/dexter-oconnell-referee

John Ertle tells us what goes on at a cemetery when you’re not there. He’s crawled down into graves and removed thousands of tiny flags for Memorial Day. He says it’s OK if Suzanne gets a huge statue of herself doing a Rocky-style pose for her gravestone. Original McSweeney’s interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/john-ertle-buries-dead-people

Avril and I read an interview about selling knives door-to-door. We also cover the definitions of diaphragm, wrestling movies, Days of Our Lives, Bon Jovi, Avon, and Hempfest. Original McSweeney’s interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/never-been-to-jitterbugs-an-interview-with-michele-beardsley

Erica Jameson runs a camp that’s been in her family since the 1930s. We talk about animals and how to kill them, as well as that old camp standard--Bloody Mary. In the last 10 minutes, my daughter steps in to ask some hot-button camp questions and to give “shout outs” to kids in her class. Original McSweeney’s interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/erica-jameson-is-not-crazy-nor-in-a-cult

Avril and I discuss airplane drama, 80s trivia, and her mom, who called BINGO for a brief time in the 80s. Original McSweeney’s interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/jackie-watson-on-calling-bingo

Allison Williams had a long career as a fire-eating, whip-cracking trapeze artist. She talks about what it's like to put fuel in your mouth and to use a whip to crack celery out from between some guy's legs. Original McSweeney’s interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-eat-camping-fuel-an-interview-with-allison-williams

This week Avril and I talk about what it's like to work at a sperm bank, and what it takes to be a firewalk instructor. Needless to say, we know nothing about either. Original McSweeney’s interviews: here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/the-sperm-bank-an-interview-with-dina-n https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/an-interview-with-robert-cork-kallen-certified-firewalk-instructor

Preston Smith, who works in a jail, talks about how weapons are made from toothbrushes, how women hide food in their “purse,” and how farting causes the most fights.

Larry worked for the Air Force, back when there was budget for researching UFO sightings. Now the aliens will probably just catch all of us unawares… Original interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/tell-me-about-your-lights-in-the-sky-an-interview-with-larry-haapanen

Dave Norman is a writer who wrote about paintball until the industry dried up. He’s met William Shatner and Russians making tanks to play paintball. Original interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/dave-norman-and-the-paintball-invasion-of-normandy

Kari was a lifeguard back when there were no real rules for lifeguards. Avril and I talk about this job, and Ludacris, and a car called a Comet. Original interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/saving-lives-and-doing-dip-an-interview-with-kari-former-lifeguard

Phil So was an ice cream truck driver for a brief time. Hear about the ins and outs of how he held his territory. Original interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/phil-so-sold-ice-cream-to-your-children

This week, Avril Watson and I discuss Tom Cooney, who worked at a potato chip factory. We also touch on 80s telephones, solar panels, and scorpions. Original interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/wearing-a-shower-cap-and-raking-the-chips-an-interview-with-tom-cooney

Going to mix up the podcast. Some will be with the interviewees, and some will be reading the interviews without the interviewee present. Give me feedback! @iloveusue on twitter, facebook.com/suzanneyeagley or suzanneyeagley.com.

Shelby Frantz worked in two huge haunted houses in Kansas. Drunk people yelled at her. She was an angel. Original interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/shelby-frantz-come-home-with-me-i-drive-a-chevy

Abby Markson is a former “clothing exchange” employee who lived in LA and saw all kinds of nasty things. She has also taught music and been in bands, and collected fur for orphaned animals (long story).

Stephan Horvath wants you to remain calm when your kid has lice. It could be worse (listen till the end if you want to know how). Original interview here: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/stephan-horvath-picks-out-the-lice