Tuff Love With Robert Kandell

Many women struggle with losing themselves in relationships. When they’re single, they can feel clear and connected to their sense of self and direction, yet when in a relationship, they lose connection to their own desires and collapse into the reality of the person they are with. Anna Wood, founder and CEO of Brains Over Blonde, says being raised watching Disney movies, women are conditioned to believe that in order to find love, on some level, they need to be saved. Brains Over Blonde is a feminist lifestyle platform for women who refuse to choose between femininity and success. Discover how women create empowered relationship dynamics where they are able to show up in their power, boundaries, and desires, and how they craft relationships on their own terms and not simply play into the role that Walt Disney and modern culture has crafted for them.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebo

What is patriarchy? Wikipedia says patriarchy is a social system in which males hold primary power and pre-dominate in roles of political leadership, moral, authority, social privilege, and control of property. The word patriarchy is attributed to a guy named Sir Robert Filmer. Research shows that we started off as an egalitarian society. There was equality and there was not a huge difference in the genders. It was the rise of agriculture and domestication when patriarchy started to hold its roots. Patriarchy has been co-created by all the genders. So how do we end the patriarchy? Ending the patriarchy is going to take both parties being willing to listen, for the feminine to show up with the emotional and energetic feeling of it and the masculine to listen to the feminine, and to come together to create a solution that feels good to both them.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuf

At some point in our lives, we’ve all felt like we were being dragged around by life and on a merry-go-round of stress instead of being in the driver seat. Randy Spelling knows that feeling all too well. Coming from a very prominent Hollywood family, Randy lived a life full of glitz, glamour, and wealth. You would think it’s perfect and he had it all together, but like most people, he struggled with a low self-esteem and trying to figure out his purpose in life. Randy talks about his journey from being clueless to freedom strategist. He digs deep into the concept of over-consumption and habits of people’s daily lives that cause them to be dragged around not knowing what to do about it. Learn how to connect with yourself and stop being dragged around by your life, take the reins to be more present, have a deeper connection with their true self, and get more fulfillment out of life.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: rob

On the Kinsey Scale, there’s the hetero, gay, and something in the middle called bi-curious. The Kinsey Scale is used in research to describe a person’s sexual orientation based on their experience or response at a given time. Jeff Jacobson, a coach, educator, and author, happily identifies himself as gay. He tackles issues such as societal chasms that exist between the two sexual orientations and the subtle misconceptions on being straight and being gay as he lays down the raw basics of the differences of views. Welcome to Season Three of Six Vulnerable Conversations. This version is Six Vulnerable Conversations Between a Gay Man and a Straight Man. Saying that title just add some sensation in my body. I am very happy to admit that. I’m very happy to have my good friend and colleague, Jeff Jacobson, come onto the show for the first of this show and it’s called a Be Straight, Be Gay. Just the aspects of what it means to be these types of social orientation. My history, Jeff’s history, and we get right down to

There are many men in the world who seem to be succeeding at everything, except when it has something to do with women. Ken Blackman was once one of those men until he figured out that he needed to shut off that part of his brain that is asking for instructions and instead just let intuition take over. He has been teaching couples for 18 years on how to get to this channel of intuition, so they can get into a deeper level of intimacy and communicate each other’s emotions and energies. Ken defines great sex is one that gets better continuously and the ideal place to get this great sex life is through committed relationships.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

The concept and effects of isolation in the modern age as an adult has become one of the most important issues that is being dealt with today. It has been found that isolation has become a huge problem and has been described as a deadly epidemic in the US, especially for middle aged men. Learn more about the issues surrounding isolation and loneliness and how to combat it to avoid the chances of illness, death, broken relationships, and other pitfalls. Equip yourself with the knowledge on how to face the challenge and deal with it.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

Too often we find ourselves in the achievement trap, which is following what we think we’re supposed to achieve. We’ve been programmed to go after certain dreams and live in certain ways to truly be successful. We’re always trying to please, and look perfect and be perfect for everybody else. In the book, The Achievement Trap, Brandilyn Tebo talks about how to undo those beliefs and live your true, authentic commitments rather than in accordance to what is pleasing and satisfying to others.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

What does it take to be a man? With how contemporary culture has evolved, Robert Manni explores the idea of authenticity in present-day society where it has become confusing to be a man in today’s world. He delves into what it means to come out and be real with your partner, and stresses how important it is for men to start looking inside to realize who they are and what they can contribute so they can be comfortable with their own skin. In his novel, The Guys’ Guy’s Guide to Love, he illustrates the dynamics between flawed men and savvy women as they compete for love, sex, power, and money in the city where they play for keeps.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

The culture that we have right now has made deep connections between masculinity and patriarchy. But cultures change with time so men need to see themselves in the man’s world. Kevin Oroszlan describes the rise of the awakened masculine as a journey of a man in man’s world, realizing that the myth of the masculine is dying. And when a myth dies, it means that life breathes anew in this awakening. Kevin shares that spiritual practice, like meditation, not only leads to peace and focus but also presence and attention.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

Guns in video games have been around since the 80’s. Has this fueled the idea in young men that taking the life of someone at the pull of the trigger is all okay granted they have their reasons? Perhaps, but it all boils down still to the mental health of today’s gamers. Gun violence happens mainly because of toxic masculinity which happens when men aren’t taught how to deal with their emotions. We can all talk about how we can stop people from getting guns or how we can control them, but the focus must still be in teaching men that they a have a space where they can understand and properly deal with their emotions.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

Men are just programmed to hide the things they think will make them look weak and vulnerable to the rest of the world. Things like being present with his emotions, accepting his feminine energy and a conscious relationship with sexuality. Remember what it was like to lose your virginity and how you felt the lack of knowledge about sex? Remember that time when you finally felt like you were the man who knows everything there is to know about being in bed with a woman, but you still felt there was this disconnection? You try to find yourself, and you eventually do. But then you finally meet the girl that will make you feel what love truly is. And then your relationship with your sexuality turns a new page where the connection and the love is there. One man shares his journey and relationship with his sexuality.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube

The way we show up for anything is the way we show up for everything. Which is why showing up for sex is as important as showing up in the boardroom because it reflects character, personality and attitude. Intimate communication expert Jamie Thompson teaches her clients the Wheel of Desire where there is the light and the shadow of the mind and the body. The shadows of the mind is where the fantasies reside, whether you’re a man or a woman. Your primal desires lives in the shadow of the body. Jamie explains in full with her own experiences and distinguishes the differences between man and woman.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

Holding onto to anger or grudge is one way of engaging with people. This seems twisted, but this is the truth because holding grudges bring some kind of value for angry people. It’s time to drop your shit because grudge is a form of pain, and this kind has a physiological and psychological effect on a person. Not only does this grudge hurt the person you hold it against with, but it will also hurt you when you never stop being angry. You just end up breaking your own heart. People often wear their broken hearts like a badge of honor. But the thing is, you can always choose to not always be angry. Learn why anger is as powerful an emotion as love and how we can let go of it to reframe ourselves and be better.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

Emotions govern judgement, which is why there a need for us to understand and use them as fuel for our passion. But the passion of a man is different from a woman. In a patriarchal society, women don’t have a voice and their passion burn out to the point that they just freeze. Kasia Urbaniak teaches women the Art of Verbal Self-Defense, a tool to use to get back their voices when their systems freeze . This is also a way to flip the power dynamic by asking questions about the question. Learn how safety can be built through experience and play back with society in a sassy and classy way.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

Sometimes the seeds of addiction are buried so deep we aren’t even aware of them. Sometimes it takes a friend or an intervention to shine a light for us. But when we start to face this controlling force, we begin to take back our control and our lives.This negative connotation about addiction has never left our society fully, but there are programs and organizations that help in confronting addiction as an integral part of the recovery process. Al-anon and SLAA is just two of these organizations and programs that help addicts confront the shame of their situation. Willing addiction away is not possible, but handling this broken piece of yourself will make you run your life the way you want. This week’s show is going to be intense. It’s about this force in our lives that we don’t even want to confront. Come listen as I tell stories of what I’ve learned from my addictions.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love C

Kelly Notaras came recommended. Recently transplanted to Boulder from NYC after a run of successful corporate jobs in the publishing industry, she was the perfect fit to work with us to help my business partner Nicole’s first book, Slow Sex. She came recommended because Kelly was more than an editor – she was a seeker, a meditator, and had incredible acumen on how to take ideas and transform them into a book. I’ve enjoyed a 7 year relationship with her where she’s shown up above and beyond time and time again. She’s in the final steps in publishing her own book for Hay House “Your Brave and Beautiful Book”. Come take a listen as we discuss strategies and secrets on how to birth your first or 10th book.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

Being unique and different is a way to live life for some people because it not only means they are standing out from the crowd, but they are being true to the integrity they stand for. When they follow the path of people who are successful, and start knowing what they didn’t know, they shrink into themselves and not like what they are seeing. But a life lesson isn’t a life sentence. Learning from others and reaching out for their support is necessary to get to the next phase of life. Mistakes in life will happen one way or another but the question is what you do when it happens to you. Fearing mistakes is part of the growth process, but making it part of you will make you a better person.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

For a lot of people, fear is an obstacle that is difficult but not impossible to overcome. When we walk into an unfamiliar street and get to a dark area, we stop moving out of fear. Fear makes us not want to ride a rollercoaster or swim in a backyard pool. We stop going to places and experiencing life because fear is weighing down on our shoulders. However, there are two kinds of fear; one that is unconscious and the other conscious. If we are aware of our fear, then we are given the time to make a smart choice and use that fear as a stepping stone instead of a wall. Learn more about the fear body and how it can serve and educate you.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

Men not being so attached to their emotions is a default program hard-wired in their maturity process. To face their fear of intimacy, they wear masks to become confident in their relationship, or they get angry a lot or just become sexually immature altogether. But women have an even greater fear of intimacy because they feel like once a guy gives his love, she somehow owes him a debt. A way around this is to find a partner who is also a reflection of your progress and shortcomings, sharing your experiences with each other through this step by step practice. Find out how to receive love and make a deep and lasting connection. Listen to the podcast here: Our Fear of Intimacy   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn

Show 001 didn’t make it because I forgot to press record on Zoom. I even forget what it was about it was so long ago. I started my podcast because I was done, after 12 years, of running in-person workshops but still had plenty to say. “I’ll start a podcast. Why not?” 100 shows later, my life is radically changed. I’m married, step-dad to two powerhouse little ladies, live in suburbia, building an amazing business and writing my first book. Most importantly, I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. Come join for my 100th celebratory show where I’ll be joined by my muse, Morgan Kandell. We’ll be talking about creating a dynamic life, supporting each other’s evolution, what our marriage means to us, and other fun topics.   Love the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! Here’s How » Join the Tuff Love Community today: robertkandell.com Tuff Love Facebook Tuff Love Instagram Tuff Love YouTube Tuff Love LinkedIn